Surprise! Matron of honor's second baby is due 6 days before the wedding!

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@YVRTrish:  You can definitely be hopeful about the situation, but chances are 6 days post birth she will not be up for a wedding.. yet alone being MOH. Even if she gives birth earlier it may be hard. Being a mom to a newborn can be super demanding by itself, not even considering her own healing and such. 

Post # 4
Member
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I lived a normal life is until the day I gave birth. It always surprises me how many bees say they would count out a pregnant bridesmaid. 

Post # 5
Member
1662 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@YVRTrish:  Wow! I usually think a pregnant BM is no biggie, but that might be tricky getting closer to your wedding. You totally have the right attitude about it though. 🙂 How exciting! 

Post # 6
Member
1896 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@MammaPants:  baby should be born before the wedding…. Like you said, you lived a normal life until the day you gave birth. 

Post # 7
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Hmmm I feel for you. This is tricky because I’m sure your friend would love to be there, but so much is out of both of your control. I would personally plan to have her step down, in order to better plan for the big day. Like you said, you probably don’t want her standing up there during the ceremony if she’s pregnant, or even if she is post-labor- I’m sure that could be rough for her. Perhaps she can still be involved in the bridal shower and bachelorette planning, but just skip the whole bridesmaid dress/standing up thing. If she is your best friend she will agree and understand. She can attend as a guest in the case that she can come, and if she is able to make it, can get hair and make up done with you and be part of it still. Normally I would say if she’s pregnant don’t change anything, but being due 6 days before your wedding…that’s a game changer. 

Post # 8
Member
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@YVRTrish:  I agree, being a MOH 6 days post partum is verging on super-human.  I think if I was in your situation, and she didn’t want to step down, I would want to include her, but not put myself in a bad position if she couldn’t show up.  Have her help you plan, pick out dresses, party at the bachelorette, do all the things you invited her to be the MOH for – as much as she can.  And if she does make it to the wedding, awesome!  And if not, have someone else lined up to fluff your dress and hold your purse.

Post # 9
Member
7203 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@YVRTrish:  I had C-sections and there was no way in the world I could have been a MOH 6 days after. But I guess after 1 birth your MOH at least knows what to expect.

Post # 10
Member
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

@Andthepupmakes3:  Wow. That seemed a bit snarky. :/ You know she could have the baby weeks before your wedding, or still be pregnant when the time comes around. 

Post # 11
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@YVRTrish:  You have an awesome attitude about this. As long as you are supportive and flexible, things will work out fine. Every woman handles birth and life with a newborn differently… I think in this situation, it will just be a game of wait and see.

Post # 12
Member
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I think you have the right attitude about it! Anything could happen, so just be flexible and ok with it. If your MOH in still into doing this, I say keep her in the program and get a big beautiful dress.

If she’s able to make it, make sure she’s comfortable, if she’s not, ask one of your BM to be the witness in her place (thats the only technical reason you NEED a MOH). As long as the MOH is ok with potentially buying a dress and never getting to wear it! If she can’t come, maybe have her skype into the ceremony or go visit her after the ceremony so she can feel included and you can spend time with your BFF on your day!

Post # 13
Member
1896 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@MammaPants:  Sorry, didn’t mean to imply snark, it just seemed like you didn’t understand the situation because you made a comment about how surprising it is when people don’t want pregnant bridesmaids. I think that’s different than this situation, where if she hasn’t given birth she will be 6 days overdue and could literally go at any moment during the wedding.  That’s a major crapshoot that she even goes that late- much more likely, she will be post partum and potentially recovering with stitches and a newborn she’s not really ready to leave for half a day.  I just don’t think it works when the timing is set up like this.  It’s WAY different than someone being like wah, my bridesmaid is going to have a big belly in my pictures!

Post # 14
Member
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Lol. I really do just find it surprising. I have seen a lot of posts like this recently and I had to get that off my chest.  Everyone is different. Six days after I had my daughter, we were walking about a mile to visit my dad in the evening, stitches and all! Hopefully your MOH will either be the resilient pregnant lady, or the super rebounding not pregnant lady! I bet she will give it the GI try!

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