(Closed) Surprise shower – not all guests invited to wedding. Help!

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

is it an option to go ahead and add these 3 ladies to your guest list and send thrm an invite?

Post # 4
Member
9143 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

That should be fine. 1. It was a surprise shower. 2. Co-workers know they don’t always get an invite.  I think you’re good and shouldn’t worry about inviting them.

Post # 5
Member
4722 posts
Honey bee

I agree. I think you’re fine not inviting them. This is one of the exceptions to the rule. 

Post # 7
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@alex88:  I had the same dilemma. I didnt invite my co-workers until 2 weeks ago after we got some NO replies back and I saw room on the guest list. I explained to them why their invites were so late and they were thrilled to even get an invite at all. So I think as long as they know the deal its not rude 

Post # 8
Member
4496 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We have huge showers at my work – the entire building is invited (250 people!) I work on a team of about 30 people, but I am not even inviting all of those people, let alone the entire building! I am only inviting 7 people (and their spouses) from work. I know that a big shower is coming up, because they do it for everyone, but I think people will understand that inviting everyone is just not realistic.

I did feel really bad about this in the beginning. People give lots of gifts (usually the person’s entire registry is taken care of just by the people at my work!) and monetary contributions.  I feel horrible accepting a gift from someone that I’m not inviting to the wedding! But we are having a small wedding (50 guests) so I think most people understand (at least I hope so!).

Post # 9
Member
243 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’d be inclined to invite them if you can fit the extras. Whatever propriety says, it sounds like these people really care about you to help put on a party and probably feel left out. 

Post # 10
Member
7240 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

I don’t think you should feel bad about that and you don’t have to invite them. At just about every office I’ve worked in, I was invited to showers and not the wedding. People want to support you, but they know you’re really “work” friends. Don’t stress about it.

Post # 11
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t think you have to invite them to the wedding. Perhaps you could bring something to work for your department like a cookie tray, bagels, donuts, fruit, etc ? Just as a general thank you for everyone.

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