(Closed) Taiwanese + Korean , American wedding?

posted 8 years ago in East Asian
Post # 3
Member
2476 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Hmm, this is a personal decision that you and your FI should sit down with each set of parents and discuss. 

Some of my Chinese friends have done complete tea ceremonies… others just do smaller elements of Chinese culture, like incorporating a dragon dance or doing a Chinese banquet style reception.  I’ve also had friends who have changed into traditional garb halfway through the reception.  I think it’s nice to incorporate some of both cultures into your wedding… just ask your parents and future in-laws and see what they think.  🙂

Post # 4
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee

My husband is Caucasian and I am Chinese and we did a tea ceremony following our morning wedding.  Typically they are done in the morning before the actual wedding ceremony, but because of timing we had the tea ceremony right after the reception.

Maybe you could do the tea ceremony in the morning and do a Korean ceremony at your reception?  Or maybe you could do a tea ceremony and Korean ceremony both at the reception?  I’ve heard of that being done.

Attached are pictures of the tea ceremony I had.

[attachment=365922,46959] [attachment=365922,46960]

Post # 5
Member
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

His parents will probably want you to do paebek.^^

Post # 7
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee

We just had a tea ceremony following the wedding since we had a morning wedding but it didn’t include the exchange of any jewelry.  However, we did give my parents and his parents a gift in appreciation of raising us during the rehearsal dinner (a GPS for each parents which my mom loved since she has a terrible sense of direction).

Post # 8
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Orange County Performing Arts Center

Depending on time and such, you may want to talk to each side of the family and have them choose 1 or 2 traditions they’d like to see. I had a friend who had to deal with something similar.  They talked to each side of the family – and each side wanted them to do several huge traditions.  They began feeling overwhelmed with all the traditions that their wedding began to not feel like them anymore so they went back and asked each side to choose one tradition that they could not live without.  It turned out to be a nice balance. 🙂 Good luck!

Post # 9
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2010

You should ask your parents what cultural expectations they have, and he should as his parents the same.  I am Taiwanese American – born here, so I’m fully Americanized, but my parents were born and raised in Taiwan.  When I asked them if there was anything that I should do to observe the culture, they said that weddings aren’t that big a deal in Taiwan like they are here and that there was nothing to observe.  So, we’re not having any kind of cultural activity or tradition in our wedding at all. 

Post # 10
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m Korean and my Fiance is Taiwanese. We’re both fully ‘americanized’ (though I hate to say that, because of course, we are! We’re Americans! Ha!)

I didn’t plan on doing any of the cultural-type things (Pae-Baek, Korean Ceremony), but was surprised to learn that his side of the family, wanted us to do a tea-ceremony. I’ve no objections, but was definitely surprised to learn they actually had something in mind. So, never assume – that’s for one!

I also think another thing to consider is, if you’re having alot of non-asian guests attending. They would surely love to experience and witness something culturally different I’m sure! I’ve seen complete disinterest when the guests are majority asian, and complete delights – when non-asian guests were treated to something different! =]

Post # 11
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

My husband is Korean and I am Taiwanese. I had intended to just do the western ceremony so we won’t have to worry but my mother-in-law insisted on having a pae-baek so in the end my mother-in-law organized a rehearsal dinner as a paebaek.

 

I definitely agree with what many bees shared above, to communicate each others’ expectations. Not only about cultural traditions, but how many guests on each side that are friends of the parents they expect to bring.  Our parents’ generation are used to large weddings where people can bring anyone; so it’s hard for them to decide who to invite in a 100+ ish wedding (which is relatively small in their standards)

Post # 11
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

My husband is Korean and I am Taiwanese. I had intended to just do the western ceremony so we won’t have to worry but my mother-in-law insisted on having a pae-baek so in the end my mother-in-law organized a rehearsal dinner as a paebaek.

 

I definitely agree with what many bees shared above, to communicate each others’ expectations. Not only about cultural traditions, but how many guests on each side that are friends of the parents they expect to bring.  Our parents’ generation are used to large weddings where people can bring anyone; so it’s hard for them to decide who to invite in a 100+ ish wedding (which is relatively small in their standards)

Post # 11
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

My husband is Korean and I am Taiwanese. I had intended to just do the western ceremony so we won’t have to worry but my mother-in-law insisted on having a pae-baek so in the end my mother-in-law organized a rehearsal dinner as a paebaek.

 

I definitely agree with what many bees shared above, to communicate each others’ expectations. Not only about cultural traditions, but how many guests on each side that are friends of the parents they expect to bring.  Our parents’ generation are used to large weddings where people can bring anyone; so it’s hard for them to decide who to invite in a 100+ ish wedding (which is relatively small in their standards)

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