Taking the same hyphenated name…

posted 3 years ago in Legal
Post # 2
Hostess
11839 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

batbrain:  that is super frustrating!  I don’t have advice, but keep fighting for your name change. 

Post # 3
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Have you spoken with your local social security office? they might be able to help

Post # 4
Member
7003 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’m sorry this has been a pain for you.

I agree that you should try the social security office before the DMV. I changed my name quite a few years back (no longer wanted to be associated with my father, but that’s another story!) and went through the court process to do it. We were told to go to the social security office first.

Also, in the event you do end up needing to do a formal name change, don’t be intimidated by the process. It was very easy. I live in CA, so I’m sure the procedures vary a bit if you’re in another state, but it’s pretty straight forward so long as the state websites have enough instructions or you’re willing to put in some time asking clerks any questions you might have. I bought a “how to change your name in California” book to make it even easier.

Good luck!

Post # 5
Bee
1837 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor

I suggest you send a PM to Mrs. Scone – she and her wife hyphenated their last names just as you described, and she may be able to provide some advice!! Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
1032 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Whoa, that is really annoying! So sorry you are going through that. My DH and I both kept our own names (ex. Smith and Jones) and we hyphenated our son’s name (Smith-Jones).

Post # 7
Member
564 posts
Busy bee

This is dumb (of them). You’re in NY? Here’s the relevant law: http://www.cityclerk.nyc.gov/html/marriage/domestic_relations.shtml

It obviously says nothing at all about name order on hyphenations (and it would be highly out of character with the permissive nature of the law to require such a rigid idiocy). I don’t know if having the actual statute will help you negotiate with morons, but at least you can know the law is on your side here.

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