Post # 1
ok so i love tattoos, i dont have any well i have my eyebrows tattooed dunno if that counts but anyways ive always wanted a tattoo but i never knew what? I had my daughter a yr ago and i wanted to get her initial on the inside of my wrist or on my front shoulder, something small and girly.
Problem is FI doesnt like them, says theyre a turn off and my parents also hate them, so basically theyd all be mad at me if i did get it, i tried getting FIs support if he supported the idea id go get one asap! but it kind of stalls me that he wont say yes. and i REALLY want to do this for ME, its totally meaninful to me.
i dont know if i should just go and do it or never do it and resent him for never supporting me
This is kind of what i want
or her full name like this
Post # 3
I would explain to him why you want what you want. I deffinitly wouldnt do it without him knowing. I got one when my FI wasnt fond over the idea, and even tho he got over it, he still sometimes throws it in my face. just lay it out on the table that this has soooo much meaning, its nothing tacky, and its something you realllly want.
Post # 4
DH1 hated tattoos…he thought they looked ‘trashy’ on women. BUT, he knew that the 2 I have now (got 1 when we FIRST started dating and the other shortly before he died) were meaningful so we talked and compromised a bit. As it happens, he didn’t like them anywhere that couldn’t be covered by clothing (like the wrist) and a few other spots he didn’t care for. However, he didn’t mind them on my back for whatever reason…so that’s where they are. And I’m glad I didn’t do it on my wrist or ankle, because my hair and/or clothing cover them up if I need to.
I wouldn’t get it if he was completely against it, but I’d see if you could reach a compromise first. Explain WHY you want it, and go from there.
Post # 5
He will get over it. He’s your fiance!
Post # 7
I say it’s your body and you should do what makes you happy. Of course, I might be biased, because I love tattoos! I have my kids’ names across my wrists.
Post # 8
ive TRIED explaining and telling him that i want it for me and it means soo much because shes my daughter and that i always wanted one.
FI just tells me “fine get it and when your parents see it ill say i had nothng to do with it” or ” get it but i dont like it”
its like jeez
Post # 10
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
Do you know WHY he hates them so much? Honestly, if it’s a deeply rooted belief then he probably wont just “get over it”.
I have a lot of tattoos, as does my FI, and we both like them, but once I mentioned wanting to get a simple henna style tattoo on my hand like these:
Bnd he was completely against it. He apparently HATES hand and face tattoos (I agree about the face) because they look trashy to him, and you don’t have the option to share them or not– they’re just there. I wouldn’t get it without at least consulting with him and explaining why it’s important to you, and understanding why he’s so against it.
Post # 11
He told me its a turn off, but never really says anything else besides that.
And with my parents i always ended up doing what they said and all that bs, so theyd be pissed too. no support on either side. but then again i AM 22 lol
Post # 12
“fine get it and when your parents see it ill say i had nothng to do with it” or ” get it but i dont like it”
Hes approving!!!! but he will get over it, as long as its not a deal breaker..
Post # 13
I’d think of something you love about him physically. Now pretend that he decided to change it… forever. How would you feel? Would you get over it probably, but how would you feel in the long run. Would it be a constant reminder that he chose not to consider your feelings or do you think you would see that he likes it and be okay with it.
Now think about how HE typically handles things like this… do you think he would build negative or positive emotions over time.
I’d also think about how long you’ve been thinking about getting a tat, maybe give him the same amount of time to think about it. If you’ve been thinking about it for a year and want him to have a fully formed opinion in a month or so he may not have one.
Post # 14
haha true i hadnt though it that way, BUT we usually agree on everything and hes the type that as long as im happy hes down with it EXCEPT this. i guess i mainly want him to say “yes get it!” or “ill go with you” but hes so blah when it comes to it.
Post # 15
It’s your body. Do what you want.
Post # 16
It is your body. Not his. He doesn’t own you – do what you want!