Post # 1
My FI is a high school English teacher. In the northeast, the school year starts in September, normally a few days after Labor Day. That beng said, we really have our hearts set on a fall wedding. The idea of being in a gown and tux in 100 degree, humid PA summer sounds absulutely disgusting to us.
We’re pretty sure we’ve found our venue (going back on Sunday to see if we still feel the same way about it we did last week when we visited for the first time). It’s a golf course (never in a million years did I think we’d like it) with really lovely mature trees – that you can be married among. We LOVE this idea (yes, planning a rain back-up, of course). That being said September and the first two or so weeks of October would be perfect for us. Oct 11th is booked, Oct 18th is FI’s stepmom’s birthday, and I fear that Oct 25th might be too chilly. We thought Oct 4th would be perfect, but then learned it was Yom Kippur (we’re not Jewish – we’re Catholic – but having a secular wedding) but some of our guests are Jewish and we don’t want to ruffle any feathers, or have anyone not be able to come because of that.
That brings us to Sept 27th – are we crazy, since he’s a teacher and will be only 3 weeks into the year? Rosh Hashana is that Thurs-Fri, so his school will be closed and he will be off work those 2 days before the wedding (good thing!). He would probably take the Monday after off to recoup. We’re delaying our Honeymoon – We’re planning a mini-moon somewhere warm in between Christmas and New Year- and a big trip to Europe in Summer 2015.
He gets crazy stressed in the beginning of the year – but all the major planning should be done then, right? It’ll just be seat charts and RSVP cards and stuff left the month before, right? I totally anticipated handling most of that anyway – FI is super laid back and honestly doesn’t care too much about details.
Is this doable, or will he spontaneously combust? Any advice from teachers would be appreciated!
Post # 3
I’m a high school English teacher and would never get married during the school year – it would just be too much.
But, I’m the girl. I did most of the planning/organizing. So it depends how much you are expecting him to do and if you are ok with pretty much being in charge of any last minute stuff yourself.
How does your FI feel about it? How long has he been teaching? I ask because I’ve been teaching 13 years – it would be easier for me to have a september wedding as I have done all the teaching stuff before. If FI is in his first few years, there’s a lot of work he’s doing every day
Post # 4
@Glasgowbound: From the get-go we agreed that it was going to go down during the school year – it was just a matter of when.
Next year (2014) will be his 5th year teaching. That being said, thanks to the wonderful state of PA’s public schools, he has been in 3 school, teaching 3 grades within 4 years… OH! And laid off twice. He left the district this year, so hopefully, he will remain at his current school and with his current grade & his curriculum and lessons will be ready to go from this year.
I think a lot of his September drama comes from the fact that both times he was laid off, he was re-hired with about 3 days before the kids started to get his stuff together. We’re hoping against hope that doesn’t happen again. We’re anticipating him returning to the same school & the same grade. But that being said, I am not a teacher, and I can not fathom how you guys feel at the beginning of every year.
Once he found out that he’d have the 2 days before the wedding off, his little lightbulb went on and he seems on board. I just want to respect his feelings, mental health and his career because I know being a teacher ain’t no joke!
Post # 5
I think since he will be off the two days prior anyway that it would be fine. If you were taking your honeymoon immediately after, I would say no however.
Post # 6
I have been a teacher for 5 years and my fiance is also a teacher – and our wedding is going to be right at the beginning of the school year. The benefit is that you have all summer to plan – and we are just going to talk to our friends/family that we will need help with last minute errands when the wedding gets closer. You get personal days for a reason and I’m sure if he needs to use a sick day or two he can do that as well.
Jobs are jobs and you are celebrating one of the most special things in your life – finding someone you love. Anybody would understand! If it was a baby and you guys would be gone for a long time to take care of it, that would be different. But it’s a wedding and only over a couple days, you’ll get back to work and then you can plan a great honeymoon/alone time at a later date (which we are excited about because right after the wedding is usually so crazy anyway – people don’t always enjoy their honeymoons).
Post # 7
It’s not like this thing that’s going to totally uproot your lives – you aren’t even going on a honeymoon right after (but you BETTER go on a mini-moon that weekend!!)
It’s just a wedding. 🙂
Post # 8
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@hazeljayne: Remember it also means your anniversary will always be during the school year as well.
Post # 9
@beachbride1216: Agreed – I like that as well =) It’s a time at the beginning of the year when things are crazy to step back and enjoy each other. Something that is probably easy to do in the summer.
Post # 10
All the teachers I know got married in the summer. I wouldn’t do it. And I think thats a good point about your anniversary always falling at the beginning of school.
Post # 11
If it was you, I’d say no way. As the groom? I think it’s ifne.
Post # 12
@hazeljayne: My FSIL and FBIL got married the first weekend of october (on a friday even) even though she is a teacher in NJ and it worked fine for them!
Post # 13
I guess I don’t understand why it would be any different from anyone with a year round job getting married at any time? Most people have jobs they have to deal with and work around. I’m sure it’s doable if it is when you really want to get married!
Post # 14
I am not a teacher, but a student and because of school, I had to let go of being a fall bride. I wanted to get married on our 8th anniversary, September 25, 2015, but it would be too difficult, with my guy in his PhD program and me in my Masters.
Post # 15
Why can’t you get married on his step-Mom’s birthday?
Post # 16
@BrandNewBride: 1. It’s her day! 2. It might be a little late in the season. Since you’re in Boston, I know you know how October can be weird (we had snow on Halloween 2 years ago)… and we were advised that if we wanted an outdoor ceremony the first 2 weekends would be best. If we found a place and we loved the indoor facilities, Oct. 18th would def. still be an option to negotiate. As it stands now, we like somewhere with an outdoor ceremony.