(Closed) telling guests not to wear wedding colors

posted 6 years ago in Themes
Post # 3
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Piney River Ranch

Personally, I think guests should be able to wear what they want.  So what if they’re in the same color as the BMs?  It’s not like it’s the same dress.

Post # 4
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Nope, not even a little ok. You can’t dictate how your guests dress. 

Post # 5
275 posts
Helper bee

Nope, you can’t.


Post # 6
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m making all my guests wear this t-shirt:

This way I will ensure that none of my guests are confused for members of the wedding party.  I will have these available in a variety of sizes for guests to put on when they arrive.  Otherwise, who will even be able to tell who the bride is?  It would be chaos.

Post # 7
7904 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Nope. Not okay. If someone specifically asks what the BMs are wearing b/c they don’t want to match, great, but other than that, keep your mouth shut.

Post # 8
1849 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@peachacid:  too funny!

I wouldn’t be very receptive to being told what I’m not allowed to wear. Besides, would it really be a disaster if someone thought for 1 second that a person may be with the wedding party when they’re not? A disaster worth taking precautions against?

Post # 9
1820 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I was in a wedding where a guest wore a dress in the same exact style and color of the bridesmaids. She had no idea of course, and was so embarassed. But nobody mistook her for a bridesmaid because she wasn’t wearing the matching shoes/jewelry/sitting at the headtable/carrying around a bouquet/attached to the bride’s hip all day. We all had a good laugh about it and the wedding was just as fabulous as if she had been wearing yellow instead. It made absolutely no difference. Nobody is looking at wedding pictures and mistaking her for a bridesmaid, and if they do, so what??? 

I agree with everyone else, and I think it’s really rude to tell your guests what to wear. 

Post # 10
378 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Agree with PPs. I understand why you would want to ask them not to wear the colors, but honestly, you really can’t. And it is highly unlikely that anyone will be wearing the EXACT same color (unless your color is something simply like black). Really though, the important thing is that all of your guests look fabulous and are wearing what they feel good in. So don’t stress about it–like others have said, no one will mistake a guest for a bridesmaid.

Post # 12
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

No way this would pe pretty off putting to me as a guest.

Post # 13
28 posts
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think it’s very reasonable to request that guests avoid wearing the same colour as the bridesmaids, although probably hint of it rather than state it outright. For example in the dress code section of the invitation include something like: Bridesmaids: blue evening gown, Best men: black tuxedos, guests: black tie attire, etc. And if people turn up wearing the same colour as the bridesmaids then there’s nothing you can do about it. Generally though, when they know what the bridesmaids are wearing common courtesty dictates that it’s unlikely that they would wear the same colour.

I don’t think it’s at all rude. In my circles it’s quite common to have a dress code section, and it avoids confusion as to what to wear as some events, despite the venue and the time, can be much more casual and other’s much more formal.

Post # 14
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@peachacid:  YOU ARE MY HERO!!!!

Post # 15
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

You know, if you don’t make sure people don’t wear the same color as the bridesmaids, you’ll have people wandering around looking for the bridesmaids all night long.  Honestly.  People will be like, “Hmm…are the bridesmaids those seven girls in pink standing up there with the bride, or are they the people in pink sitting down in the seats, scattered throughout the guests?  I just cannot tell!”  It will drive the bride crazy.  Further, unless you make sure no one else wears even a smidgen of white to your wedding, NO ONE WILL KNOW WHO THE BRIDE IS.  “Is the bride the one in white up there exchanging vows, or is she the woman sitting back there in the white hat?” they will ask.  

I urge you all to take my advice and offer matching t-shirts to all guests to avoid such confusion.

Post # 16
5109 posts
Bee Keeper

@anitabonita:  I WISH I had known the bridesmaids colors before I went to a wedding recently. I was a late addition and wore the EXACT color of the bridesmaids dresses… I felt horrible, absolutely horrible.

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