We're having a destination wedding in cancun. And both the Priest there, and the Priest in the church that we attend in monterrey seem to think that the other one should be helping us with logistics/information etc
and given that im not actually catholic (mixed marriage, catholic + christian) im not sure what i need to decide/choose...other than readings. and how to make it predominantly spanish, but with at least part of it in english.
is it possible to do the vows in both languages (mine in english, his in spanish?) Fi doesnt seem any more englightened than i am!
Talk to the priest who is actually marrying you about the vows. And if your fiance' is the one who is Catholic, get him to help you-- or his family. It can be complicated if you don't understand. Why do you need it to be bilingual? If you have family who speaks Spanish, get them to help you with a booklet. I ended up cobbling together our booklet based on a LOT of search results and examples and using the "Together for Life" book as an outline. Good luck!
@Merelymere: We want it to be bilingual if possible as my fi is mexican,(we live in mexico), and his family speak no english at all. Im English, and my family speak no spanish at all. If we can't make it a little bit bilingual, then one family and set of guests is going to be sitting there for an hour with no idea whats going on! plus ideally, we'd both like to say our vows in our native language
The priest over there doesn't seem to reply to emails other than to confirm availability- he simply said to work it out with our priest here. He didnt even reply to my email asking how he felt about a full mass for a mixed marriage, and no one answers the phone there!!
Ive asked fi to speak to his family but he hasnt gotten around to it (im organising the wedding generally, but i need extra help with the catholic bit). Maybe ill dig out the dictionary and try to speak to his mum directly
We cornered our priest after mass (er, but in a less aggressive way than that sounds) and he gave me a copy of a wedding book in English which im taking a look at. but he seems to think all our questions should be directed to the other priest!
@newname_99: Fun for you! Bless your heart.
Ok-- that book is probably the "Together for Life" book. That's like your Catholic wedding bible ;) Basically, it's a choose your own adventure way to plan your wedding.
Since you LIVE in Mexico, you at least can get help with translations for your Mass...that's good. How far away is the priest who is marrying you-I know you said Cancun and Mexico is a large country...are you going to be there for any wedding-related stuff before the wedding? Could you meet him in person and discuss everything?
I (obviously) have NO idea if these things would be OK but some options might be:
***) Printing your Mass booklet in English AND Spanish (tedius but helpful?)-- you could either do separate books for each language, or one larger booklet with English AND Spanish in it so everyone can follow.
***) I don't know if it's cool to do your vows in your native language (ie- one in Spanish, one in English) or if it would all need to be the same for simplicity. I imagine that would also depend on the English/Spanish skills of your priest and others directly participating in your Mass (cantor, readers, etc.)...could you have a translator, similar to a sign language interpreter?
***) It seems to me that your Parish priest should be able to guide you a bit or kind of work out some kinks between the two churches. Do you have anyone in your office who acts as a wedding coordinator who may be able to help?
This is quite a challenge.
@Merelymere: Its about a 90 min plane ride away, but not sure if ill make it there in next 2 months =S
I checked and the book is called the 'Rite of Marriage'. It seems to have some guidance about readings, prayers and info about the ceremony with and without full mass. Except i don't know if there will be a full mass since he hasnt replied! (i have no objection to my fi taking communion even though i cant). So i guess Ill finish reading it, select the readings and then look them up in a Spanish bible?
the priest in cancun is fully bilingual (hes from Ireland but has been in Mexico for 20+ years) but honestly, im getting the impression he just plans to turn up on the day and see how it goes. Our priest is actually bilingual too, hes originally from the US. The original plan was to take him with us to cancun but he decided it wasnt feasible.
The reason its a little more complicated (or seems so) is that the cancun priest isnt attached to the chapel we are getting married at. Its not used for regular mass (though of course its recognised by Catholic church as valid location) so it doesn't have its own Priest. We found this Priest at a local church and have asked him to come out for the wedding. As I understand it, other brides who got married at his church had to go through his church office if they wanted to get answers for specific questions. Hes not good at direct responses.But since we're not having it at his church...hsi office secretary can't help i don't think?
I think having a bilingual booklet would be a good idea! If vows do have to be done in one language then i think i'd better brush up on my spanish. A translator is possible i guess, though i dont know if its better to ask a bilingual guest or hire someone!
Its taken ages to get all the papers in order, and we only got everything together recently (permission from the bishop for fi, i had to fly back to england to get certain things amonsgt others) which im hoping explains the lack of support so far. Bleugh! Im sure it shouldnt be this hard!
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