Terrified bride! Help

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
858 posts
Busy bee

Dont worry. dont worry abotu others thoughts or feelings. This day is about you and your FI and that is all that matters!

Post # 3
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Frim1031:  Maybe you can ask your pastor or whoever is marrying you to not have a mic used during the vow portion? Our pastor had a mic, but I spoke softly. I truly forgot about everyone when it came to our vows. It was just DH and In that moment.

Post # 4
Member
1528 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: Disneyland - January 2016

megz06:  I agree. If you don’t want everyone to hear you speaking then they don’t have to 🙂 Your vows and thoughts that are meant for your groom are specifically that…just for him.

Post # 5
Member
5017 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Frim1031:  This was my biggest thing – I hate being the center of attention! Honestly, once I walked down that aisle (which was a little nerve wracking), I totally forgot that everyone was staring at me. I was only focused on my FI and what our officiant was saying. 

I think most people associate public speaking with speaking in front of a large group of people you DONT know…. it’s a great feeling when you know everyone and they are so supportive of you. For some reason, I just didn’t feel those nerves (even during our first dance, cake cutting, etc… I never once felt nervous and like people were staring at me).

Post # 6
Member
1055 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014 - Loft

Frim1031:  ok.. you said two things you se as negatives that could really be seen as positives!

1. “they love the groom” BINGO, no one will be paying attention to what you’re really saying.

2. “They don’t really care about the wedding” Awesome! This wedding holds dear importance to you because its YOUR wedding. Do you think the people there are going to care about what you two have to say to eachother? Its your bond.

And lastly, just focus on your husband to be, focus on what you’re saying. Just look at him, take deep breaths and everything will be fine. You’re going to do great.

Post # 7
Member
5839 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

 

Frim1031:  Judgy people will be judgy regardless of what you do/say. But most people will be so happy and supportive that it doesnt matter what happens. They just want to see the love between you two. You could fall on your face walking down the aisle or say his name wrong (like Princess Diana) and NO.ONE.WILL.CARE. It will become a a cute, guess what happened on our wedding day story.

So take a deep breath, focus on you FI and let your happiness and love flow out of you. (and if you really, really dont think you can do it–xanax)

Post # 8
Member
479 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Would it be easier for you if the officiant said something very traditional (Do you take this man to be your husband…etc.) and then you simply reply “I do”?  I think nowadays a lot of people are really into writing your own vows but I wouldn’t be comfortable with saying so many personal things in front of an audience either.  We kind of went halfway and repeated the phrases after the officiant (I bride, take you groom to be my husband…) because it felt more substantial to us than “I do”.  

Post # 9
Member
2637 posts
Sugar bee

Would you feel more comfortable with your back to your guests?  Ask your minister/pastor/Officiant about ways to stage the wedding that might minmise yur exposure to your guests.

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