Post # 1
I am waiting on one more RSVP for our wedding. It is a family of 4 so I definitely want to know for sure if they are coming or not as I am doing a tented reception and only want to order enough tables/chairs/linens/china for the people that RSVP yes. And it makes a big difference in the tent layout if it’s 100 or 104 people because I will need an extra table.
She told me a few months ago via text that they were going to be there, told some friends of ours that they would be there, and told my FMIL that they would be there when she declined the bridal shower. But they haven’t sent the RSVP back yet.
I texted her yesterday morning to see if they were coming and I haven’t heard anything back from her. I know it takes her usually 2-3 days to respond to texts so I didn’t really expect to hear back yet.
But if I don’t hear from her by the end of the weekend, do you think I should assume they aren’t coming? Or should I try to reach out to them one more time?
I need to finalize the numbers by Monday with the caterer, the rental place, the bartender, and I need to order all the linens.
Post # 3
@mtbikelover: You should try calling her instead of texting. Leave her a message and text her if she doesn’t answer letting her know that if she doesn’t get in contact with you my X, then you assume that she is not coming.
Post # 4
@MRSsrm85: Agreed. Let them know vocally that if you haven’t received their RSVP by X date, then you will assume they are not coming. I really don’t get WHY people can’t just pop a prestamped envelope in the friggen mailbox. Why is that so difficult?
Post # 5
@Baroness_Meg: I don’t get it either. But this friend isn’t very considerate when it comes to other peoples time. She shows up late to everything..not just a few minutes late, but 45-60 minutes late. I actually thought about changing the time on her invite since I was making them myself so that she would make it on time to the ceremony.
At this point, I don’t even care if she comes or not. I just want to get the tent layout and all the other stuff finalized so that I can focus on something else. I hate having to follow up with people. But I don’t want to get caught off guard if she already thinks she RSVP’d because she texted me she was coming.
Post # 6
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
@mtbikelover: I’d just keep following up. It’s annoying, but better to try to get all the info. I’m dealing with this same thing myself – our caterer needs our final count tomorrow…
Oh, and I’m personally taking the route of NOT being up on my high horse about needing the actual physical RSVP, but just needing a firm concrete confirmation of attendance. I don’t think needing the actual RSVP is the right hill to die on, ya know?
Post # 7
Definitely call, and leave a voicemail. Waiting around for a text that may or may never come sounds silly to me. It’s annoying she can’t get it back to you quickly, but just call and get it over with.
Post # 8
I’ve been where you are. Why can’t people just put the damn RSVP in the mail?!
I would definitely call. Tomorrow morning, Saturday morning, Sunday morning, call her husband/ boyfriend, message her on FB, etc. That’s super rude of her. But it would suck for them and for you if she and three other people showed up to your wedding with nowhere to sit at the reception.
Post # 9
I would call or text once more. If I got no response after that, I would text or email that I was sorry, but that since we had no rsvp and no response to follow up messages, we were going to have to assume that they were unable to make it and mark them as a “no”.
Post # 10
I hear you all on the calling her but she is more of a texter. I will give her until tomorrow afternoon to text back and then I will call her. She isn’t on facebook that I know of and I don’t have her email. She isn’t a big one for technology.
@lolot: And yes, I completely agree that I don’t need the actual RSVP back. But she verbally told us she was coming to the shower and then when I asked her a question about it a few weeks before, she replied that she might be going on vacation and probably wouldn’t make it – not a definite no or yes. The shower invite said only regrets accepted. She never declined so I followed up and found out she wasn’t coming. So I don’t really trust her verbal affirmations.