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Thank You Cards - Help!!

posted 2 years ago in Paper

Member

3,755 posts

Honey bee

amariem25 October 2009

I had my bridal shower last Saturday. One guest bought a gift through my registry online and didn't realize that the gift was shipped to me ahead of time and not to her. I had opened the gift at my house when it arrived because I didn't know what it was and the packaging didn't say anything about it being a gift. So then that guest wanted to still come to the shower and didn't want to come empty-handed so she brought my wedding gift for me to open. Do I write her a thank you note for the shower gift which I recieved in the mail at this time? And then wait until after the wedding to write her a note for the wedding gift which I actually recieved at the shower?

And here's another tricky one. I was registry stalking last week and noticed my Great Aunt bought me a gift. I thought this meant she would then be at the shower, but she wasn't. The gift arrived today in the mail and I opened it. Do I assume this is a shower gift and write her a thank you card for it now? Or did I do the wrong thing by opening this gift? Should I have assumed it was a wedding gift and have waited until after the wedding? (It could very well be a wedding gift because last week was when I sent the wedding invites out, but it also happened to be just a few days before the shower.) When should I write her a thank you? I don't want to write it now and have her be mad because it was supposed to be a wedding gift. I don't know if she knew that the gift was shipped to me either. Should I just say thanks for the gift and I hope to get a chance to visit with you at the wedding?

2 years ago

Member

2,099 posts

Buzzing bee

caitlanc September 12, 2009 Western Slope of Colorado

As for the guest not wanting to come to your shower empty handed, I would thank her for both gifts in one note when you send out your shower thank yous and then send her a Thanks For Coming note after the wedding and touch on her generosity again.

As for your Great Aunt, maybe send her a note now saying thank you for the gift and that you're so looking forward to using it after the wedding. (My understanding is that you can open wedding presents received before the day but that you shouldn't use them.) After the wedding send her another note saying thank you for coming and repeat your thanks for her gift.

All that said, I'm not Emily Post and all that up on the proper ettiquette. I just know that it's better to thank than to not.

2 years ago

Member

567 posts

Busy bee

Habibi

You absolutely should open all wedding gifts that arrive prior to the wedding AND send a thank you note as soon as possible i.e. before the wedding.

For the guest who sent the shower gift and brought the wedding gift to the shower I would send two seperate notes as they are for two different occasions.

As for your Great Aunt can you have your mom call to ask her if the gift is for the wedding or for the shower? If you are uncomfortable with this just write a generic thank you and say how excited you are to see her at the wedding. If she gives you another gift for the wedding then send another note.

HTH!

2 years ago