Post # 1
I need help Bees – invitations went out one week ago (yay!) and along with RSVPs we are also receiving gifts off of our registry.
WHEN should I send the thank you cards for these gifts!? I plan to write the thank you cards as we receive the gifts in the mail, but I am getting mixed reviews on when to actually SEND them.
I think it would be nice to acknowledge to the sender that we received the gift (and are very grateful) as soon as possible. Others think I am “crazypants” for wanting to send them before the actual wedding. . .
I suppose I see their point – I cannot also thank guests for attending the wedding if the actual wedding hasn’t taken place yet. . . But at the same time I feel like 55 days to send a thank you is a bit long. . .
I don’t know what to do. What did other Bees in similar situations do!?!?
Post # 3
If you send them now it’s one less you have to worry about later.
Post # 4
You send them now. You do not thank guests via thank you note for attending the wedding. The reception and speaking to guests at the wedding is the thank you.
It is most poilte to send thank you notes on the same day you receive the gift.
Post # 5
You’re given up to 1-year grace period after you receive your gift to thank the sender, but if your schedule allows, thank the gifter as soon as the package arrives. Besides, if people ordered off an online registry or what have you, they would want to know that what they ordered was received by you and not lost in the mail, KWIM? Besides, it gets you in the mood for the wedding – sending out thank yous from the “both” of you. Umm…I don’t know if most Americans send thank yous for attending the wedding. (Sorry, not from this country!) But I do know many couples have some sort of cutesy “thank you” photograph that they take on their wedding day and send it after the wedding (usually for presents they received the day of)….I don’t think it’s customary to send a thank you just for attending. Though, if someone did attend and didn’t give you any sort of gift, then yes, I would send them a thank you for attending and sharing in your special day.
Congrats on your engagement and GL!
Post # 6
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
@Suerte: No, you are not allowed 1 year. That’s a myth. Guests are allowed 1 year to send the gift, but you should send the thank you as soon as possible and certainly not later than a few months of the wedding.
Post # 7
If you are not waiting on photo Thank You cards, I would just do it now so it is fresh and you don’t have a giant stack to go. Otherwise, you can technically wait until after the wedding since most people don’t usually expect a wedding gift thank you ASAP. If you do wait until after the wedding (and especially if you do photo TYs), I would order them ASAP and get them out quickly before you forget or lose the motivation.
Post # 8
A thank you should be sent as soon as you receive the gift; people want to know you have received it!
Wedding guests have up to a year tospend gifts. Brides and grooms have anapproximate three month period after the wedding to send thank yous for wedding gifts.
Post # 9
@andielovesj: this is correct. There are a lot of crazy misconceptions about thank you notes, but etiquette rules are quite clear that the thank you note should be sent as soon as possible after receiving the gift.
Post # 10
Emily Post says up to 2 weeks after a gift is received. Personally, this wasn’t possible for us. I would say no more than 3 months.
Back to the OP…you’re gonna want to stay ahead of those! I would take a few minutes each night when your spending time on the couch in front of the TV. You will be so glad and your guests will be super impressed!!
Post # 11
Send thank you notes as you receive them so that people know that you’ve received the gift. I did not send a separate thank you note to thank people for attending.
Post # 12
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
Thank yous should be sent as soon as possible- within 3 months maximum (one year is not correct!)
I did the thank yous for pre-wedding gifts when they came in-you’ll be VERY glad you did!
Post # 13
Thanks for the advice ladies!! I had planned on sending them now. But when I was speaking with some co-workers, a few told me I was being an overly ambitious bride for wanting to get them out as we received the gifts. I just wanted to see what others had done.
I know if it were me, I would like to know the gift was received. . . and I’ll thank myself later when I have fewer to write after the wedding 🙂
I will go ahead and send them now then!