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Can you get married at the JoP now andthen have the wedding next summer to make your parents happy?
We could do the JP this summer. But if so, I'm not sure if either one of us would want to have another wedding. We feel the JP would be our real and only wedding. I love my parents so much, but I'm not sure if we would want to do this just to appease them though, something wouldn't feel right in my heart...
Do you know anyone who has wed at the JP and then had an additional ceremony later?
I feel your pain on the law school front. I am (finally!) a 3L and realyl can't wait to get it over with and get married! And the money I made from the summer is helping the wedding budget big time! If I were in your position I would probably hold off on the wedding until August 2011, after explaining everything to your parents. But, it really depends on teh vibe you get from them. If they are extrememly unhappy about it, and you think it would negatively impact your relationship enough, then living apart for another year won't kill you. Another option that a friend of mine did was to rent a 2 bedroom apartment and each of their things were in a different bedroom. That might make the parents more comfortable. It is not as cheap as a 1 bedroom, but better then 2 apartments!
I don't know anyone who has done the JoP then a wedding thing and I completely understand how that would take away from the wedding you do next summer!
Honestly if I were you I would talk to your parents and explain your stance and then move in together and get married next year!
@Lisa: Congrats on almost being done and on your upcoming wedding! Are you going to tie the knot before or after the bar?
We plan on doing exactly what your friend is doing, with the two bedroom apartment for the both of us. I should probably emphasize that to my parents, maybe that would warm them up to the idea a little more.
@FutureMrs.M: Thanks for your opinion and understanding! I hope they'll understand also if we just sit down (over the telephone is sadly our only option as we're across the country right now) and have a heart to heart :)
@Golden-we are getting married post-bar, in Oct. And I won't start work until January (deferred), so I will have a good 2 months before and after the wedding to plan and then recoopoerate! August is definitely a good month for law school weddings :) you will have a blissful first semester and he will be on a high for finishing the bar! Enjoy it :)
@Lisa: What wonderful timing and autumn wedding are gorgeous. Enjoy! And you're right, August would be be a perfect time for us.
I just noticed your wedding date now. Oops! It's perfect :) I'm in New York for law school (not sure if you are also), so it would be funny if we were at the same school!
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Hi Hive
I've been away from the Bee for so long because of my first year of law school and miss it so much. But I really need some advice and knew that the hive would be a great place to come to.
My fiance and I have been engaged since January. We are 24 and both go to the same law school, but currently don't live together. We would like to live together next year seeing as we wil have been together for over five years and would like a space to call our own. The issue is whether we will be married or not.
My traditional parents would like us to marry this summer so we would be married before we live together, as they do not support the alternative. The problem is that money and time are very tight for us as two busy law students, and our families would not be able to help much in paying for the wedding. Therefore, my parents suggested marrying with a Justice of the Peace, a la Mrs. Mary Jane, which would be lovely. But I have always dreaed of having a ceremony/reception with family and close friends to celebrate our love (budget friendly, of course - under $5000).
If we wait until the following summer (August 2011), my fiance will have graduated law school adn taken the bar and I will be entering my final year of law school, which means a much less stressful time for both of us. And more money saved from two summers of both of us working and saving over the school year, so we would be able to pay for the wedding ourselves.
But here's the clincher--long story short--my parents are finally warming up to my fiancee (I think they were afraid to lose me and see their little girl grow up awww) and I really don't want to do anything to damage that progress, which I am worried our living together before marriage would do.
My fiance and I have talked about this and even tried to plan how to have the wedding we would like to have on our tiny budget with minimal time to plane, and it would be a possibilty, but we just don't know how feasible it would be. We both cannot wait to be married, but know it is important for it to be the right time in life for us as it is such a special occasion.
So for any of you who have been in a similar situation or just have an opinion to share--please let me know your thoughts on if you think we should get married this summer or next.
Thanks!