Post # 1
Time Magazine’s August 12, 2013 cover features a photo of a blissfully happy, childfree couple relaxing on the beach. The cover article then goes on to discuss the childfree life.
As someone who will be getting married in five months, this topic fascinates me, YET, I am very surprised to see this article on the cover of Time. Is this really a Time Magaizine cover worthy topic?
I had thought by now the fact that some couples CHOOSE not to have children was already well established and wouldn’t be so newsworthy. Moreover, I am shocked by how much criticism and judgment so many “childless by choice” couples still face from people assuming they are selfish or unable to have children. The feminist in me really values and respects the fact that women today can CHOOSE whether or not they want to be parents, and I find this article a bit behind the times. What are your thoughts ladies?
Here is the article:
Post # 3
I think it’s news worthy simply because so many people still don’t respect the fact that some people CHOOSE to not have children. My friends BF was denied a vasectomy at 27 because he might change his mind. They do not want children, period. The lifestyle they desire does not include children.
It’s also interesting from a population standpoint. Where is the balance? What percentage of 20 and 30 somethings have to have children to maintain the population?
Post # 4
@MsGinkgo: That’s a great point on the population aspect.
Post # 5
I don’t see why this is cover worthy at all. It also seems to be way behind the times…. this isn’t a new phenomenon.
Also, am I alone in thinking that a lot of CBCer stuff is just so freaking… offputtingly smug? I mean, I know that I live and work in aggressively left wing circles, which probably don’t represent the rest of the population, but I do find the criticism of “breeders” etc etc a hugely offensive pain in the arse.
Since when is this sort of thing anyone else’s business?
Post # 6
I’m CBC and get flak for it everytime we’re in a large gathering…as if we’re just dating unless we have them…and some parents, but not all of them, look at you down their noses, as if they’re doing something so much more meaningful than you are….either way, it is newsworthy to me, because unless you’re one of those people, you don’t know what its like…and for the record…dual income + no kids = AWESOME
Post # 7
@Rachel631: Those were my thoughts exactly: it seems behind the times and excessively smug.
@Nona99: It is so disappointing that in 2013 people can’t respect your decision not to have children.
Post # 8
@Rachel631: I’ve experienced/witnessed/been guilty of going on the offense when something is a topic that MOST people will shame you for. As a CBC woman, I’d say a majority of other women we encounter are those that look down at you for not having a kid, or possibly worse- feel sorry for you. It’s a coping method to go on the attack of “breeders” and have a laundry list of why having children sucks.
I don’t express any opinion IRL to anyone but I definitely can think of a million reasons why it’s dumb to have kids. Or specifically, LOTS of kids. Would I think this way if it wasn’t for mothers giving unnecessary “advice” and not sparing judgment towards me? I don’t think I would. If it TRULY was “to each her own”, no one would need to defend their choices.
It can be a harder life in a way to not have kids and be surrounded by people that do. It’s why I’m desperately ready to get away from my family.
Post # 9
I think it is cover worthy, because sometimes I think young women don’t even realize they have a choice on the matter. It’s almost as if not having children would make a women less human, or at least less a female.
I totally support women & married couples making the decision to have children, or not to.
My husband & I are undecided as to whether we want children in the future, & we figure we will just want to see if we change your minds & feel the urge to have them at some point. If not, we are perfectly happy to spend our extra time & money on lots of vacations & other fun things 🙂
Post # 10
@FLBlonde93: …meh….it really doesn’t bother me, I knew I never wanted to have children….not that I don’t like them, enjoy spending time with them or am unable to have them…I’d just rather live a life devoted to self exploration and the endless discovery of the mystery that is Mr. 99….
Either way, the article bears reading, and when I do find myself surrounded by people that insist my life isn’t complete without children….I just wait, because sooner or later, they’ll have to leave, and I won’t have to listen anymore…babysitters are expensive now-a-days…;)
Post # 11
@Nona99: Knew I liked you.
Post # 12
I would have preferred to see this in a YW’s magazine, like Glamour/Elle/Cosmo/whatever.
I think it would have been a cover-worthy issue for a YW magazine.
I this this affects young women way more than whoever reads Time (No, really. Who reads Time?). I would prefer this issue was discussed by younger women for younger women, because I think PPs are right–some young women don’t know that there is a huge, flourishing CFBC culture, and that not having kids IS an option!
Post # 13
@Kat: “I think it is cover worthy, because sometimes I think young women don’t even realize they have a choice on the matter. It’s almost as if not having children would make a women less human, or at least less a female.” +1!!
I’m only 23 but I even grew up with the thought that I would have kids because it’s just what people do. As soon as we were married we started receiving pressure from all over the place about having kids. His mom and aunt boast about having kids less than 50 weeks after they were married and told us that we should start trying as soon as possible.
When we told them we were waiting at least 5 years they told us that it was stupid to wait. We are actually about 95% certain that we don’t want kids (we know this could change) but have decided not to share this because DH thinks his mom will freak out and get angry.
I also have friends who tell me that I “don’t understand what it’s like to be busy until I have a kid.” Like PPs suggested, it seems as though they look down their nose at me because I don’t have kids and some people who know that we don’t plan on it just shake their head and tell me that we’ll change our minds.
Sorry about the rant 🙂 We’ve been asked so many times over the past few months when we will start trying that I’m starting to get fed up. That’s why I do think this topic is cover worthy. I don’t know anyone who is married over the age of 30 who has willingly chosen not to have a kid. Most people I encounter just assume that everyone wants kids which is definitely not the case. Rights now we’re really enjoying our DINK status!
Post # 14
I don’t have a subscription to Time so I can’t read the entire article but I find the idea of the article to be cover worthy. If 1/5 of the population are choosing not to have children it would be interesting to see if the article actually explores the reasons behind the shift. This may not be a new phenomenon but the rate of childlessness has increased which is new.
Post # 15
I do believe it is new-worthy as it plays a part in societal structure, population demographics and the consumerism America is oh so reliant on to drive the economy.
Post # 16
Anyone have a link to the full article without needing to be a Time subscriber? I’d love to read the whole thing. I think it’s fascinating from a sociological perspective. I personally have always wanted kids, and I realize that this is very much the norm in our society. So it’s interesting to read something about a group as a whole, rather than a few individuals that I know.