Post # 1
I’d first like to state that I’m conflicted here. I’ve never been to a wedding with assigned seating, and one of the weddings had close to 250 people. I had never heard of assigned seating or escort cards until I started looking wedding stuff online last spring. I remember thinking, “Escort cards, what for?!” HAHA Oh how we learn throughout this wedding planning process!
My FI and my family are all in the wagon of “not arranged seating needed”. I’m just wondering if we should though! Here’s our story:
My FI has a very small family, like his parents are guaranteed to be there and that’s it. His grandparents all died long ago 🙁 and his aunts/uncles all live up in Michigan (we are in Colorado) and just never come this way and he’s only met them a few times. He has three cousins, that’s it. He also knows that his godfather will come with his girlfriend and that’s basically his “family”. We are also inviting some people he works with that he’s close with but that’s about it because he was content with that. I on the other hand, have like 10 aunts/uncles, 15 cousins, divorced parents (both remarried but dad’s wife isn’t coming because, well, that’s a topic I’ll never get into! haha), grandparents and some close friends of the family are coming for both sides too. So in all we expect around 70 people or so out of the 130 we invite due to travel distance or just can’t make it for whatever reason.
Do you think it would be better to have assigned seating? We were planning to have a few tables that are labeled for the “Bride’s Family” and “Groom’s Family” like my cousins and sister all did for their wedding. Our tables are only 48″ tables (4′) that seat six comfortably.
Please give me some advice here with the experience you had so if I really decide this would be best I have “info” to give the FI and my family.
Post # 3
It’s becoming more common in my area to assign tables, but like you, I have not been to many weddings with assigned seating. I plan on assigning tables, not actual seats.
Assigning tables in your case would probably be best. Your guest list is small enough that doing a seating chart shouldn’t be too much of a hassle!
Post # 4
If you feel like guests would be more comfortable without the assigned seating, I would mabye just reserve two tables for your immediate family and his immediate family. Putting a cute sign on the table would help with that, and everyone else can still enjoy the non-assigned seating!
Post # 5
I’m in the camp that is a big fan of assigned tables (but not specific seats) at weddings. It’s always awkward to be the guests that end up stuck (due to space) at a table where everyone know each other but you. With your small guest list, it shouldn’t be too hard to put assigned tables together and even if your guests don’t expect it, I think they’d appreciate. I know I do as a guest!
Post # 6
As posted above, we are doing assigned tables. I kept reading over and over how guests didn’t like having to find their own spots or they arrive at diff times and get outcasted by not being able to sit with the few people they would have liked to. Then you may end up with 2-3 tables of mixed people/couples who are likely to be very uncomfortable all night. Wouldn’t you rather sit with people you know?
I think table seating is the way to go.
Post # 7
I personally love assigned tables because the last few to enter aren’t “stuck” sitting with somebody they don’t want and it’s less confusing.
Now granted, our seating chart was a big pain in the butt (No, she can’t sit with him!!, etc. LOL) but it worked out beautifully. And I had fun making the escort cards. 🙂
Post # 8
hehe Silly me, forgot about just assigned tables when I was writing the post. That’s a good thought. The only thing I would be worried about, splitting up people since our tables are so small. We plan to have around 12 tables or so I think. My dad’s side of the family, how can I say this nicely, are not social people and come off as snooty but are just quiet and to themselves—they all live within a mile or so of each other for the most part out in the country!!
Edit: We are also holding the ceremony and reception at the same venue–which is a small place in itself–holds about 96 people at seated tables.
Post # 9
I am always a fan of assigned tables but not seats. It makes it so much nicer for the guests in my opinion. And it was actually fun setting up the seating arrangement.
Post # 10
I’m definitely FOR assigned tables. That way guests are (hopefully) not stuck at a table where they no NO-one. Or worse – what happens if one couple arrives late and there are two seats next to each other for them and htey have to split up?? I think if you aren’t going to do assigned tables, you’d need to make sure there are extra seats, not just the exact number of guests you have coming. I did assigned tables for my 30 guests. I wanted to make sure all the parents were the same distance from the bride/groom table and I had to make sure I split up my husband’s family because his mom and dad are divorced and wouldn’t have been happy sitting at the same table. It was interesting, but worked out well once I had it all figured out!
Post # 11
Good point ladies! I will try and do a mock up today to show the FI and talk to him about it. Of course I won’t know for sure until the RSVPs come in around late August (mailing out invites week after the 4th!). Thank you for all your input about the experiences you had—-I’ll keep those in mind to tell him 🙂