Weddingbee boards

Does anyone else get asked ALL THE TIME if it's any different being married?  I mostly get asked this at work where pretty much everyone is married and almost everyone is older than I am.  I cannot stand that question.  We have been married for a month.  A week of that month was spent on our honeymoon.  Of course nothing is different!  The ONLY difference I feel at this point is that we are no longer living in sin.  That's it.  And that's probably the only difference I will feel for a while.

I hate it when someone "older and wiser" says that marriage changes things and your relationship will change.  I know that, thanks for pointing out the obvious!  Of course your relationship will change!  All relationships change!  Hello.... I mean I really want to say to someone sometime, "I realize relationships change, hence the reason I am not a 23 year old still waiting to be tucked in by mommy and daddy and read a bedtime story."  I get it, relationships change.  Mine with my husband has certainly evolved since when we began dating.  But having only been married a month (and let's be honest, this started almost as soon as I got back from my honeymoon) of course my relationship hasn't changed significantly.  Relationships change over time, I get that.  In the grand scheme of things, a month really isn't that long.

I just wish those "older and wiser" people would keep their opinions about marriage and relationships to themselves.  Especially at work.  I didn't ask for their opinion or advice, thanks. 

End vent.  Anyone else deal with this?  If so what do you say to the person? I tend to mostly nod and smile.  Any advice?

@yrett107 - Thanks!  Glad to know I'm not the only one.  You probably posted that around the time I was getting married, so I would have missed it then!

Ehhh...I think most people ask that to newlyweds simply because they don't know what else to say.  It's just small talk.  I'd let it roll right off your back.

People used to ask me that all the time after we got married ("Does it feel different being married?").  I just used to laugh and say, "Not really, but my ring finger does feel a lot heavier now!"  Then I'd just smile and change the subject.  Whenever I don't know what to say, i just try to say something silly or lighthearted to lighten the mood/ change the subject.

It's not that it's offensive, it's that I hear it probably 3-4 times a day, every day from the same people.  Also, the question always seems to come with the expectation that something about your relationships IS different just because you got married.  When I say no, people always ask,  "Really?  It's supposed to feel different."  What do you say to that?  It doesn't feel different.  So suddenly you're judged by someone you hardly know because your relationship isn't different now that your married.  That's what I find offensive.

ETA: This is just my opinion, I'm not trying to be mean or rude.  This is just how I feel about the question.

@MightySapphire - I love the t-shirt idea!  That would make things soo much easier!  And you're right it's the repetativeness of the question that's so irritating. I work with abotu 70 people and there's a lot of in and out, so if I haven't seen someone in like a week or so, then I get the question again.  Or there is one person who asks me almost every day, and then tries to lecture me that my relationship SHOULD feel different. 

While I'm not married yet--got seven months to go--I totally understand how it would be annoying after awhile. I get tired of people asking me, "You excited?!" Well, duh.  I can't remember which gal said it before, but I think she's right that most people just don't know what to say and just spit out the generic question. I guess I'm lucky because where I work, with mostly men, they couldn't give a rats butt that I'm getting married :) I already just let the stupid questions roll and say, "Yup!" and talk about other things. Eventually people will stop asking.

@Curlysue - It's funny, because I work mostly with men, and they're the ones who keep asking me those questions!  Especially the one who asks almost every day!

otb--okay, well then I got nothin'! HAHA Wow, men asking that question is different to me.  Do you know the guy well enough to joke and say something like, "Phil, it's great, love the man, but if you ask me again I'll staple your hand to the wall!"  :p

@Curlysue - Lol, I wish I could say that!  He's a supervisor, so while he's not my direct supervisor, he still ranks higher than I do!

Oh yeah then that definitely won't work.  Can you possibly avoid him for a few days?  If not, just smile, say "nope" and keep going.

for me being a Mrs. feels great, like i officially belong to someone and someone is officially mine