The Dreaded "What Do You Want For Christmas" Question….

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 4
9938 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Aklove:  i waited more than 8 years, the last 2 Christmases my answer was ‘you know what I want’ last year, he told me quite plainly that it wouldn’t be ready for Christmas (I got it 3 months later for my birthday).  I would do the same if I were you – hopefully he brings it up again.  Alternately, you could say – I’ve been thinking about it, there’s only one thing I want for Christmas, you know that.  Or, if you want to be really forward – find a jewellery flyer or website and say ‘honey, i want THAT for christmas’


Post # 5
765 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Aklove:  I don’t think you did anything stupid!  I don’t think an engagement ring is appropriate to ask for for Christmas.


My SO was asking me last night and I am giving him some inexpensive gift ideas (bath and body works lotions, these cute mugs from Starbucks, etc.) because we both know that I want a ring.  I also added at the end, “and of course hon, you always do a great job at picking out jewelry.”

Does your SO know what kind of ring you would like? 

Post # 6
765 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Aklove:  Yep I suspect that is the case.  If I were you I would give him a list of things you would like with a wide range of prices.  MY SO told me he just wanted a big list of things he could choose from that he knew I would like.


Post # 7
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@MsGinkgo:  My style would be to email a pic of the ring I want. For sure. Straight and to the point!

Post # 8
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If it was me I”d probably throw out a “Regarding Christmas, you already know what I REALLY want. But if you’re talking about material items, maybe this or this… or “i have to think about what i want material wise”

That’s probably enough to put it back out into the universe without being blatant

Post # 9
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Aklove:  Think about something ELSE that you want… a new camera… a gift card to sephora… having your car detailed…a massage or pedicure… seriously… something ELSE…

And try not to make him feel bad if it doesnt happen… eventually it will… and if he feels pressured it wont end up happening in a special way… he knows you want to get engaged… let him ask on his own terms…

I completely understand that there is only ONE thing you want, but really you’ll want it to be special and you will never forgive yourself if YOU are the reason that it’s not… I know I haven’t, even after 3 years…

Post # 10
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@Aklove:  I would be honest with him.  You said you shut it up in February; have you discussed engagement/marriage again since then?  Do you know if he’s ready yet?  Do you know where your relationship stands right now? These are all important things to ask/know about any relationship.

Post # 11
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

If it’s been more than 3 or 6 months since the last time you talked about it, I’d throw it out there!

“Well, my Christmas dream is winding up your fiancee!”

Post # 12
299 posts
Helper bee

@Aklove:  Your SO already knows what you want so I shouldn’t mention it again. I’m in the same boat: I hoped for the ring last Christmas, didn’t happen but he noticed some disappointment when that little square box under the tree contained diamond earrings and not the e-ring. Only a couple of letters difference but a huge difference for waiting bee’s:)


This year I haven’t mentioned Christmas yet and he hasn’t asked. 6 more weeks to go!


Post # 14
765 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Aklove:  Woo hoo!  I’m sending good thoughts your way for a holiday proposal!

Post # 15
2426 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

I’d give him a list of other gifts.  He already knows you want a ring.  If he’s not ready to propose at Christmas, then what?  Would you be upset if he picked something else (or gave you nothing) in the event that you aren’t getting a ring? 

Post # 16
72 posts
Worker bee

@sostobe:  I agree, he knows you really want! Maybe give him a list of other things you like…is your SO the kind to propose on a holiday? I know mine doesn’t want to because he wants to really surprise me.  

I’m sure when he’s ready, he’ll do it but I’m sure he’s appreciating you not pressuring him this whole time!  Good luck and we’re all with you!! 😀

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