Post # 1
To the newlywed bees, I need your words of wisdom!
It seems like as the wedding gets closer, some family members are becoming very intense and self-centered. All the minor details that impact the actual unfolding of the day are becoming fodder for discussion, even though decisions have already been made by my H2B and I. The continuous feedback loop from my in-laws, for example, has not slowed down, even though most decisions have been made–we’ve moved from planning the executing but know one seems to realize that. They’re the most challenging, but they aren’t the only ones who are acting kind of wacky. First, how do I keep them from frustrating me to the point where the wedding arrives on the heels of a lot of tension or hurt feelings, and second, did you experience anything like this before your own wedding? How did you and your H2B keep things in perspective and enjoy this period (which I thought was going to be the best part of the wedding planning process!)
Post # 3
So sorry. I didn’t run in to too much of that. Do you think you could provide some examples? Is it possible to try to stay as far away as possible from the naysayers until the day arrives?
Post # 4
Well, the most recent example was regarding the rehearsal dinner. I told my FMIL several times that we wanted our rehearsal dinner to be wedding party and our immediate family only. She repeatedly asked if her best friend from out of town could come (and this friend will be participating in a lot of the pre-wedding decorating and helping, but not because I have asked her to, but because my FMIL wants to have her around all the time because it’s her friend). I told her again what our feeling was about the rehearsal dinner (plus, it’s being hosted by my Dad and his girlfriend at their house). Low and behold, after my FMIL received her e-vite from my Dad and his girlfriend, she RSVPd that she didn’t think she could make it if her friend wasn’t invited because her friend would have "nowhere to go for the evening."
H2B’s sister also got engaged about a month ago, and my in-laws insist on comparing all kinds of details about our wedding all the time. And all of their comments are critical of ours, and overflowingly positive about hers because they have complete control over her wedding and she is the child in the family that can do no wrong. It’s like they have a limited supply of support and love for their children and they decided to just re-allocate it in the final stretch.