The great porn debate

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
935 posts
Busy bee

@whoa_its_ash:  I didnt click the link. but I see nothing wrong with SO watching porn. to be honest, I watch it myself. I find majority of women who have an issue with it, other than religious reasons, find that it creates some sort of insecurity inside of them because they cant move the way home girl in the porn is. 

frm my experience, watching porn WITH my SO gives us something to enjoy together and also helps me see what he likes based on his reactions and vice versa. we enjoy watching together. 

Post # 4
Member
1028 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@mckey430:  +1000000000000000! My fiancee and I watch porn together and alone. I think porn is fantastic and it allows me to watch other people do all the things I wouldnt/couldnt do especially because I’m a voyeur! 

Post # 5
Member
935 posts
Busy bee

@CocoClassic: you are speaking my mind !! It gives me some kind of motivation when I see these girls lol. Its actually a bad habit of mine, I watch more than my SO or at least more than he admits to lol.

 

but OMG sorry i just read your headline. Im from DC area as well and I want to honeymoon in Rio and north Salvador!! are you from there? do you think its possible for us to honeymoon there (flights included) and visit Bahia, brazil for $5000?

Sorry for all the questions.

Post # 7
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@mckey430:  +1

It’s a bonding expirience, for sure.

Post # 8
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I guess im one of the few minority left that really doesnt like my SO watching porn! No matter how many other women dont care about it, preach that its healthy blah blah and ive read alot of “articles” about it, i still just think its a huge no no in my relationship. 

Ive been with my FI for 7 years & when we first met he was 18 so of course he looked at it a bit in the early days but once we started getting serious I made it VERY clear that I wouldnt be tolerating any of it. Its a deal breaker for me. I find it disgusting & disrespectful and really unnecessary. i think women need to stop being brainwashed into thinking its ok for their husbands to be watching other women perfoming sexual acts & start teaching them some self control & respect. 

The biggest lie is, “oh well at least hes not going out & cheating on Me!”

Umm, sorry, but i hold my FI to a high standard, i expect him to not look at other women & also not cheat on me and i dont think thats too much to ask for! 

And yes im insecure but pretty much every woman is insecure! your man should be making you feel beautiful & special not wanking off to a computer screen. 

Just my opinion and i know alot of people will disagree & tell me im controlling & that he does watch porn & im an idiot but i know my own relationship and every relationship had the right to have their own terms. if you let your SO watch porn then power to you but we shouldnt be saying that EVERY man NEEDS to watch porn because its simply not true

Post # 9
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@whoa_its_ash:  My DH and I both disagree with porn. We watched it before we got serious but now we both consider it cheating. If others want to watch it then that is awesome but it just isn’t what me and my DH are into. He says he doesn’t want me getting off by another man and I am okay with that. If one of us is not home then we have our own pictures/videos to keep our lust on each other. 

Each couple needs to make their own boundaries and if one partner is uncomfortable then they don’t need articles to tell them they are wrong. There are articles that show why porn is bad and nobody who enjoys porn should have that shoved down their throat. 

Post # 10
Member
935 posts
Busy bee

@sbee21:  no one was tryin to say they need to watch porn. you took too strong of an offense. 

Post # 11
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Its been a non issue for us, since FI never dabbled in it much. He said he got as far as skimpy bikini shots, reevaluated the kind of marriage and sex life he wanted, how he felt porn was affecting that, and quit. As a teenager. Major respect and appreciation to him for that. So I also don’t care much for the “its just what guys do” argument. But I would expect any SO of mine to be sensitive to what makes me uncomfortable, and porn is a just one of those things for me. I don’t see any difference in a stranger’s dirty photo/video and the dirty photo/video of a friend, and I’m pretty sure most everyone would lose their brains catching their SO whacking it to the latter.

But then again, I also put more significance on sex and sex-related whatevers than most people. I don’t just see it as simply a carnal urge to be fulfilled, its super emotional, so that’s probably where those opinions come from…

Post # 12
Member
4760 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@sbee21:  i think women need to stop being brainwashed into thinking its ok for their husbands to be watching other women perfoming sexual acts & start teaching them some self control & respect. 

Yeah I think women need to stop being brainwashed into thinking porn is some evil thing that is akin to cheating.

Post # 13
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@sbee21:  +1 Men do not need porn and neither do women. If porn wasn’t available then men and women wouldn’t just shrivel up and die? 

Post # 14
Member
559 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@mckey430:  I would like to politely disagree.  We don’t watch porn for reasons other than insecurity, one of them is for our religious beliefs.  I am not insecure about my “moves” in bed and we have a healthy sex life.  But it is our choice not to look at porn.  I would have a problem with him looking at it because it goes against what we believe as Christians (in our personal beliefs) and against a vow we made to each other not to include porn in our relationship.

This is in no way meant to attack you and I realize you said “majority”.  I just think there are many reasons to be against porn and it’s ultimately up to the couple to make that decision.

OP, this article was interesting.  While I’m not an advocate for pornography, I did find this article interesting.

Post # 15
Member
3265 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Atalanta:  +1

I couldn’t give two craps about FI watching porn. I know he does. We watch it together sometimes.

ETA: I also don’t care if he looks at other women. I look at other guys. It doesn’t mean we’re wanting to throw them down to the floor and get our fun on with them. We just appreciate good looking people.

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors