- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
When my fiancé and I first became engaged we made a guest list (A, B, and C list). We consulted both sets of parents on this list. It is now 5 months later and the Save the Dates are about to go in the mail. Since my fiancé and I do not have all of the addresses we went back to our parents with our guest lists in hand requesting addresses for relatives.
Side Note: My parents are pretty much paying for the reception (up to a certain point…which is 150 people)…as in the location, food, and drink. My fiancé and I are paying for everything else. Fiancé’s parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner. FIL have also paid for the Save the Dates and the Invitations…which have totaled a whopping $200 including all postage. I am a bargain shopper.
Our guest list is (was) 150 people…50 of which are mine and 100 of which are fiancé’s. His family alone is 50 people- Aunts, Uncles, first cousins…this count does not include second cousins. And my family now consists of 6 people. We have some friends and co-workers on our B-List, that we’d like to be on our A-List.
Anywho, my parents checked the list over said great, here are the addresses you need. Fiancé’s parents on the other hand gave us eleven more people to add. Most of which none of us really don’t care to have there. I kept saying, then why do they need to be invited? We only have space for 150 and we are already at 160. FMIL kept apologizing but insisted they need to be on the guest list for good graces. I said if they aren’t happy they can talk to me, they can talk to my parents and we’ll tell them there isn’t room for them!
Let me tell you ladies…seven of the eleven aren’t’ family and they aren’t friends. What they are, are family of the family. Seven are the parents and siblings of two wives who married into the family. Never in a million years did I think they would make the guest list. Why should they? I’m not inviting my brother-in laws parents! Let alone an Uncle’s wife’s parents and sibling. Not when there are good friends who should be invited. And especially when no one even likes them! They are rude and disgusting, but somehow manage to get invited to every family gathering. Actually they don’t really get invited, a lot of times they just show up.
I wouldn’t be complaining if my future in-laws were contributing to the reception…even if it was just to cover their addition of eleven people. But they aren’t. And they won’t. OK I might still complain b/c I have other people I’d like there instead. But at least if they were contributing financially I could rationalize.
I haven’t told my parents yet b/c I can already hear my Mom say No, No, No, Tough. I’d like to talk to my fiancé about it but he is always sooooooooo accommodating and people pleasing that it will get me nowhere. ARGHHHHH.
Sorry for the long vent.