(Closed) The Irony in OUR wedding..

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1075 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Well then, if that makes you happy, then don’t change.

Post # 4
1523 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Janana- I think I know where you are coming from. I am also a pleaser and a helped, but that is not always healthy.

Try to make decisions that are good for you and Fiance. This is your wedding and you have every right to make your wedding feel personal. 

My mother is also not Captain Enthusiastic, so I have had to learn to ignore her a lot and not ask for her approval in decisions. It does hurt because I want her to be excited about this wedding, but I have learned to find joy through planning with Fiance.

My only advice is make decisions that are healthy for you and don’t doubt yourself when others are complaining. I know exactly how hard that is to do!


P.S. we are almost date twins!

Post # 5
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I agree with your Fiance. This is a time we should be ‘allowed’ to be a little selfish (with the understanding that it doesn’t give us carte blanche to be bridezillas)! I too have the people pleasing issue – I am always checking, double checking and triple checking with other people to make sure that what I am choosing or considering is ‘ok’ or ‘right.’ When I honestly sit down and think about it, it’s rather silly. We’re all adults, and what makes us happy on that day (us being the bee and the FI), should be what is done and what’s ‘right.’ I think perhaps we need to re-assure ourselves as opposed to always looking for outside re-assurance. Afterall, we are our own worst critic and we should also be our own best friend, our own cheerleader, our own encouragement, and our own determination. (but yes, my Fiance also is one who says ‘Bella, just do what makes you happy…’ so I know exactly what you mean).

Best of Luck,


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