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The ONLY one...

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
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    1.
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    MsBrooklynA       Midwest

    Do any of you ladies ever feel like you are the ONLY one left who isn't engaged? Three, count them THREE people i know got engaged in the last 3 days! Depressing. lol I know it will happen one day but sometimes I just feel like everyone elses BF is ready and mine is just taking his sweet ass time. I am totally just whining but i would just love to be able to openly talk about my wishes and ideas for the wedding without him either tuning me out or completely pretending like i'm talking about something else more important.

    Can you PLEASE just freaking get on with it!

    Ok i'm done now. How did you remind yourself that you are not the only one and what did you do to pass the time and distract yourself from waiting?

     
    2.
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    MsBrooklynA       Midwest

    Well apparently I'm the only one...

     
    3.
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    roxymarie      

    I know how you feel but luckily it's been three people in the last six months, not three days. I can't imagine three people getting engaged in three days! And unfortunately, I have no tips to pass the time/distract yourself. Good luck finding some!

     
    4.
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    gocubbies       Illinois

    Whew! That is a lot of peope! Just know he's got his own timeline and it's gonna happen eventually! (hopefully sooner rather than later).

    SO MANY of my high school friends are popping up engaged and some pregnant! (I'm 23, so it's "that time", lol) so I can relate.

    To help me, I've set a mental deadline, and promised myself I'll be fairly cool with all of it until then. It is the 4th of July. After that, bf and I are sitting down for a serious heart to heart about why he hasn't done it yet. Like, I will take him in the car and force this conversation on him (lol). There will be no excuse for him by then!! So, just having that in the back of my mind deters me from saying much to him.. I tell myself, he's got 3 months. I can totally wait that long.. 3 months is no big deal! It makes it easier because I can visualize a time rather than just being in the unknown and  I have no clue. I realize it's not HIS timeline, but it makes it easier nontheless :)

    Being on here also helps!!!! I love it, my bf will still be totally uninterested even after we're engaged, so WB is all I have

     

     
    5.
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    cam18    September 18, 2011   Athens, GA

    I totally know what you're going through.

    My BF is quite a bit older than me, and so whenever we go over to any of his friends' houses, everyone there (and I do mean absolutely everyone!) but us is either married or engaged. (I just graduated from college, so this also seams to be a new trend with all of my friends--I think 3 were proposed to at graduation). When I hang out with the "wives" at my BF's friends parties and things, all the engaged girls can do is ask all of the married women about wedding stuff. Now, in their defense, I imagine I'll ask lots of questions to married people once we finally get engaged too, but it just makes me feel very left out. So believe it or not, I know exactly what you're going through.

    The thing I like to think about, though, is whether we're engaged or not, I know for a fact that I have the greatest man in the world, as I'm sure you think as well. Just think about how much you love him and how much he loves you. Whether you're engaged or not, remember that you get to spend every day with the one person that makes you feel better than anyone else.

    I like to think that the reason my BF is waiting so long is because he really wants to make sure it's the right time. He wants to make our engagement special and not overshadowed by everyone else's that have gotten engaged recently. Your situation sounds similar. Remember that once your BF finally does propose, you'll be happier than all those other women ever seamed and you'll have your greatest man in the world to thank for it...not to mention that there will be plenty of other people you'll make jealous in the process. :)

     
    6.
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    speechie      

    I often feel like the only one too. It wasn't too bad right out of school, as very few of our friends were getting engaged and married (we were the couple in the serious relationship) and since then (4 yrs.) a large number have met, dated, gotten engaged and married and we are still just hanging out in boyfriend/ girlfriend land... I just keep telling myself that it will happen!

     
    7.
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    MsMamaBear       Atlanta

    That's a lot of people in a couple of days! I get that many in a year's time. LOL

    I feel that way sometimes since I am at a certain age (I'll be 29 this month), but then, truthfully, I have 1 married friend. If I counted Facebook "friends" it would be more, but I mean friends I actually talk to and spend time with, not just send a message to.LOL.

     

     

     
    8.
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    MsBrooklynA       Midwest

    @Gocubbies: I think it just seems like everyone is engaged because Facebook is like a blaring message that you are not changing your status to engaged like everyone on here you see. I should remind myself that those people are people i am not actually super close to like Mamabear said. I like your idea though. I will have to try that. I hope if you do have to lock him in the car he's got something good to say for himself!

    @Cam18: Oh i totally know what you mean! People all tell you your time will come but it's sooo annoying waiting for that time. Sorry you have to be the odd one out :o( I do love him dearly and need to remember to tell myself it's not the engagement it's the love.

    @Speechie: Me too girl, me too.

    @MsMamaBear: I blame facebook. haha i think it just really puts it in your face like hey look at all these other people who are in love and their boyfriends are ready... But, your isn't.

     
    9.
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    fuschiasparkles    November 4, 2011   FL

    Ohhh yea I know how you feel. What makes it worse is that the majority have been dating their BFs MUCH less AND are younger then me. The new thing for me is alot of my friends are gettting PREGNANT now..so now that Im surrounded by cute little ones and baby showers it makes me want to get married even MORE (didnt know that was possible lol). Its TORTURE I say!! Oh well, it will come soon-ish hopefully, I know Mr. FS is saving and just got a second job in which he will be making double what he makes now. Just think of it like this: Saving the best for last! ;)

     
    10.
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    Gemstone    July 2011   Cincinnati

    I hope you don't mind that I am responding to this because I am no longer waiting, but I feel like I have insight because I was waiting once too!

    Before I got engaged, ALL of my friends were getting engaged, which was frustrating because my then-boyfriend and I had been together the longest! But just try to remember that it isn't a competition or a race (I had to remind myself of this a lot!); it's about the love you share with your boyfriend. And that love is so special, and the fact that you aren't (yet) engaged doesn't make it any less special.

    So don't just see these days as "waiting" days, because these days, too, are a really important part of your relationship.

    And I promise that when the day comes that he proposes, it will be SO worth the wait.

     
    11.
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    Mrs. DG    July 18, 2009   Seattle/Tahoe

    I felt that way when I was waiting too!  The weird thing is that it couldn't have been true because we have more weddings this summer than we did last summer.  It just felt like everyone was getting engaged before me...

    The worst was when people got engaged after us but married before us.  It was our own doing, but it still always felt weird!

    Hang in there!

     
    12.
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    MsMamaBear       Atlanta

    Yes, Facebook does make it worse. A LOT worse.LOL I jsut try to stick to my daily friends and see their updates and such. It helps!

     
    13.
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    TheRen    May 2011  

    Im right there with you.. I feel like everyone I know is getting married, engaged, or having babies in front of me and I am STUCK here in waiting world.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ok Im better now lol.

     
    14.
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    Vegan    July 6, 2013   maryland

    I can totally relate I've had three people close to me get engaged and two of the three are getting married this year.  I know that when he decides to do it that it we'll be special and well worth the wait.  I just have to keep reminding myself of that.  It doesn't help tha his older sis is getting married this month and his younger sis got engaged last month.  Now everyone is looking at me and I'm like we'll ask him I have no idea. 

     
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    KupoKweh    December 2013   Bay Area, CA

    Yeah, it totally rings that, 'these girls got more wife material than you' bell in your soul... even though it shouldn't have any of those implications whatsoever!

    Facebook feeds the fire so bad, too... it's such a downwards spiral

    =(

     
    16.
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    VickyAurea       England

    Not me, as I am quite young! But I totally feel for you - must be way harder. For me, even though I have to wait, I'm sure people will still say I'm too young when it eventually happens. (I'm 22, not really that young, but some folk would disagree.)

     

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