Post # 1
Okay, Hive. I need some of your sage advice in this kafafel:
We found the most wonderful ceremony and reception venue.
Gorgeous, wonderful staff, well-priced with great inclusions (chavari chairs!), and so on. It is, in almost every way, our absolute ideal.
Except that they generally do not allow children under the age of 12. The policy states that they can make exceptions, but we are not sure how far we can push that limit.
Some of his family is coming from out of town (several states away), and a couple of them have one or more children under 12.
We don’t want to exclude the families, or rudely ask them to make the trip sans offspring, but we ADORE the venue and we frankly like the idea of limiting the number of kids around.
Post # 3
Will you be inviting others with children or is it just mainly a few out of town guests that have children that will be coming? It is hard to ask them NOT to bring their children, considering they are coming from out of state, where would they go? They would have to find childcare (either in their home state, or in the state of your wedding) which would make things kinda tough on them. Have you talked to the venue at all about the policy? I am sure if there are a few children, that SHOULD not be an issue, after all I am sure you could do some negotiating…I am sure you are paying them a nice chunk of change for their venue, regardless..it doesn’t hurt to ask! OR you could think of arranging some type of childcare for the ones that bring their children if the venue says no, I am sure if you explained to your guests & made arrangements for their children to be taken care of, they would understand!
Post # 4
I know a lot of people hire a babysitter to watch the kids in some other location during the wedding. I’m not personally doing this, but from what I understand it’s pretty common, as it allows parents to enjoy the party and keeps the kiddos from getting cranky.
You might check with your venue and see if there is a room at the venue that could serve as the child care room.
Post # 5
If there is a possibility that the guests with children would not come to the ceremony/reception if children are excluded, I would think of it this way…
After the wedding, would you regret not having those people there or regret not having your dream venue?
If the guests with children want to be there, they will make arrangements for their children 🙂 it’s your day, and I don’t think it’s too much to ask or rude at all!
Post # 6
I do not envy your position whatsoever! I am so sorry you are in this pickle!
I was honest and unless you decided to do an more intimate ceremony and then host a separate reception celebration that you could invite those that have children. What a bummer! I have honestly never came across that but WOW! We have so many youngins in our family that I could never be able to do this.
Again, best of luck and I hope something works out for you to have your dream venue!
Post # 7
What if you advertise “Adults Only Reception”. That is not uncommon and would limit the number of guests you have. Hopefully the venue would make an exception for the family members who bring their children from out of town. What are they going to do… kick out your guests on the day of the wedding for bringing children?? I doubt that after all the $$ they will be making from your wedding.
Post # 8
I know this is an old thread to revive, but I just wanted to thank you all for your lovely advice!
As it happens, more issues arose with the policies and we decided to wait and not sign anything. Thank goodness!
Since then, everything has worked out for us to have an even MORE fabulous venue – and let us share our day with everyone we want with us.
Thanks again, hive!
Post # 9
@Ms. Anemone: I am super curious to know where you were going to originally get married and where you are getting married! We were going to have our wedding at Semple Mansion in Mpls but changed last minute because of the age limit thing. Sometimes things just somehow work out!