The problem with surprise bridal showers

posted 3 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
4072 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I would let on that you have the guest list for whenever someone decides to throw you a shower. Are your in town friends communicating with your MOH? Maybe you could just let the MOH know that you’re in the know, and she could relay the list casually.

Or of course, you can just reveal to all that you know about the shower. I’d rather do that than have anyone offended at not being invited to the wedding.

Post # 3
Member
42538 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

wabanzi:  First of all , you can relax. You are not the hostess so you are not responsible for any etiquette faux pas.

The etiquette sites and the Bees will all say that no one who is not invited to the wedding should be invited to the shower. There are exceptions to that rule as there are to almost all rules.

Many showers are hosted by groups like book clubs, work colleagues, old neighbors, friends of the bride’s mother etc in full awareness that they will not be invited to the wedding. They just want to celebrate your marriage and share in your happiness.

 

Post # 5
Member
42538 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

wabanzi:  Remember that it is an invitation, not a summons. If they don’t want to attend, they have the option of declining the invitation.

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