Post # 1
Please read my previous post to understand this post http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/troubles-with-my-manipulative-alcoholic-mother#axzz2dN8Z3GTQ
My mother has been off and on again with her drinking being the charming slosh that she is. Now, she just has me LIVID and I’m ready to finally cut off all contact.
I posted a status on Facebook last night, “Hosting my territories first plot tour in three years and I have 85 people RSVP’d Yes!! This will probably outnumber our wedding!”
**I work in agricultural seed sales. We put all of our new corn and soybean products in a field and have a tour and nice supper to show our customers what we will be offering for the next growing season. Since I am new to my territory throwing a plot tour of this size will be excellent for product awareness.
I had a bunch of friends comment saying congrats and good luck.
Then this morning I wake up to see another comment. Oh lovely, it’s from my mother. She writes, “prob more fun ppl too!! OOOPS did I just say that??”
*Picks jaw up off floor and immediately deletes comment*
The comment was posted at 1am so obviously she was hammered. I had it deleted by 5:30am so hopefully nobody saw it. But are you freaking serious? What a rude comment to make, to PUBLICALLY attack my husband and I? I deleted her off Facebook and am about ready to finally write her off for good. How would you have reacted? I know she meant this in a mean way because she NEVER has anything nice to say when she’s drunk. She’s usually more than happy to run down my marriage and my life. Ugh, I’m just so frustrated and hurt I don’t know where to go from here. DH is just as pissed because when she’s drunk she thinks she can say whatever she wants because well, she’s drunk! Just beyond pissed…sigh.
Post # 3
I hope you blocked her as well.
I’d cut her off, TBH – no need for destructive people like that in your life.
Post # 4
@Cummins59: my mom is this way…
misery loves company. my mom gets drunk because she is miserable with her life (she has made lots of poor decisions and put herself in the positions she is in, and refuses to change, take initiative or responsibility for herself or her life). she then sends rants and novel-length texts to me telling me how selfish i am, how i abandoned my family (i moved across the country for my career), what a terrible person i am and how the whole family hates me now, etc. its crazy the things she says when she’s drunk.
she’s probably just a really unhappy person who thinks that if she isn’t happy, other people don’t deserve to be happy, either. like my mom, it sounds like she spends a lot of time trying to bring other people down.
i recently quit communicating with my mother except to answer questions about the wedding (need-to-know questions, not random ones). it has helped a lot.
sorry you’re going through this. alcoholism and narcissistic behavior don’t go well together. :/
Post # 5
@TwoStatesBride: Ugh that sounds a lot like my mother! Does she try to guilt trip you since you don’t talk to her as much? I guess that’s my biggest issue. She holds things over my head and blames me for her issues. I know they’re not my fault but it still hurts being blamed for EVERYTHING! I keep telling her I moved 400 miles away for a reason…
Post # 6
@Cummins59: sort of. but she blames all of her problems on everyone and everything else, so its not solely directed at me. its less of her blaming me for her problems, and more of her just telling me all the things she’s decided are wrong with me. its exhausting.
but to be honest, NOT speaking to her has made my life sooo much better. its sad, sometimes i want to text her and get her support, but i know it will turn into a pity party for her. so i look other places- my dad, friends, my FI…
sometimes growing up is just a bitch. :p