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The Truth About Bachelor Parties - Marie Claire Article

posted 11 months ago in Parties
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    Helper bee
    jazinlove      

    Just read this article in Marie Claire..what do you Bees think? This issue is definitely going to put a damper on a lot of bachelor party scenarios! "Male bonding at its worst"..

    http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/relationship-issues/bachelor-party-secrets

     
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    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    Honestly - articles like this piss me off.  They perpetuate this stereotype that all men go out and get drunk and cheat on their soon-to-be-wives at these crazy wild bachelor parties.  And it is simply NOT TRUE.

    Guys are perfectly capable of going out and having a good time (and even getting super drunk) without doing anything bad.  Guys that cheat on their bachelor party would have cheated anyway.  The bachelor party has nothing to do with it.

     
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    SweetRose2011    March 9, 2010  

    That article was enraging. The audacity to pretty much excuse such horrible behavior. If you know your man well enough you should be able to trust him and KNOW he's not going to cheat on you. It's not that it's "getting it out of their system" because if they were dating they were ready to be committed. 

     
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    Cash000    December 2, 2011   Canada

    Whata bunch of pigs those guys are. I am so happy my fiance is not having a bachelor party. I am also so happy that he came home at 1030 that one night of the bachelor party he attended. I can't believe the things I read. I hope those guys get their Karma in one way or another, like their wife cheats on them! I'm so mad about this, I am being irrational now... grrrrrr

     
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    highwire    September 2011  

    Marie Claire is a sensationalist, crappy magazine. That's all.

     
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    mittens111211    November 2011   Portland, Oregon

    This is something that I wonder when I read articles like this... what is the point of this? are we suppose to lock them in a closet and become overbearing biatches? I don't get it!

     
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    amnystik    April 9, 2011   Texas

    I can honestly say that I cannot believe I read almost that whole article... I serious feel sick to my stomach at how "excepted" such behaviour has become (not for all but more than I like to think)

    DH did not have a bachelor party... not b/c of things to this extent as we don't even drink but it was something that neither of us really wanted to have to deal through if any of the antics that could have come up did. DH decided that, even though he woulda left if anything out of his control woulda come into the picture, he didn't want to even have to possibly deal with that.

    I really think that the general idea of bachelor/ette parties brings out situations & behaviour that isn't good for the foundation of marriage in the first place so they should be eliminated from  the "tradition" list. <-- IMO

     
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    sailor    May 2010  

    I'm sure the occasional groom cheats at his bachelor party, but it is alarmist and, IMO, inaccurate for the magazine to suggest that this is the norm, even when alcohol and strippers are involved.

     
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    jazinlove      

    I’m not saying that kind of stuff doesn’t happen on some bachelor parties. I’m sure it does. But this article is very much one sided and it pronotes stereotypes and antiquated ideas.

     
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    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    Oh jeez. Now we are going to hear about a bunch of women spying on their men when they go out. If women are that worried, then they should just pull his pants down when he gets home and smell his...you know. Another woman's scent will be there even if he washes up. (Don't even ask me how I know this.)

     
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    jazinlove      

    @amnystik: I agree with you that traditional bachelor/ette parties should be eliminated. My SO and I are also not drinkers, we've discussed what we would want to do and he said he would have more fun going paintballing than going to a strip club.

     
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    acingthelace    September 24, 2011  

    I agree that it is NOT ok to have a "free pass" on that night. You wouldn't do it during the marriage, and if he had done it while dating it would have ended the relationship, so why is it ok for one night? Especially right before the most important day of your lives??! Totally not cool. Then they try to make the women look like strict b*****s for "not letting their guys have fun." You can have fun without cheating!!!

    I am all about him having fun at his bachelor party but he doesn't need to be touching other girls. I don't plan on touching any guys, so why is it ok for him to touch girls? It's definitely not OK.

     
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    cardus    October 27, 2012   twin cities, MN

    i had some thoughts prepared after reading the article, but it seems they've already been expressed, several times, lol.

    what a load of sensationalist crap that was.

     
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    yassim    January 1, 2011   CALIFORNIA

    I can only believe it after working with all guys for a few years, I have heard many stories similar. Like how even the women cheat (knowing someone that was friends with a male stripper)

    I was talking to my fiance about it and I said I can't believe people would make that mistake. He said that's not a mistake that's cheating, and I was like yeah that's what I mean, and he said well if they're going to do it then they'd do it eventually anyway... I think that's true, they'd do it no matter what, maybe not right away while being drunk and egged on to do it, but down the line.. or some sort of infidelity

    But I don't think this is every one ... I think it's something that maybe everyone's heard of, or dependent on the type of crowd.

    Another thing to remember is that magazine wants readers, they can say whatever they want to get you to read, same with tabloids, says who they can't stretch it? I wonder if their angle could be that someone would read it and think "wow, they have the inside info!" and subscribe... lol

     
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    MUI831    October 22, 2011   Chicago, IL

    Does this stuff happen a bachelor parties?  Absolutely.  However, I would say it happens at less than 5% of them.  And that might be a high estimate.

     
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    Leahhh    September 14, 2013   Tacoma, WA

    Reading the first paragraph made me absolutely furious. Her FRIENDS AND FAMILY didn't give two shits if her fiance cheated on her? What the fuck kind of family is this? I'm sickened.

    If that ever happened, I would not only leave, but I would pull a Lorraina Bobbit for sure.

    I can't believe a magazine for women is trying to excuse this behavior. This article MUST have been written by a man.. or a woman with zero self esteem.

     
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    Heatherloveskenny    June 4, 2011  

    Bleh.

     
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    Cash000    December 2, 2011   Canada

    @Miss Tattoo:

    lol. I don't think I would ever do this pull the pants down sniff kinda thing. But even if I did, I'm not sure I would know what I'm smelling.... Umm is that women, or swass???

     
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    ijustrockout    August 7, 2011   isle of palms, sc.

    i feel fortunate to have a REAL man that said:

    "strippers (aka prostitutes) and the like are subhuman, disgusting individuals that i want no parts of."

    enough said.

     
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    CherryWaves      

    What a load of CRAP. I completely agree with FutureKMM!! Guys are more then capable of going out and having a good time without cheating, and if they do it, then that was obviously stuck in the back of their mind somewhere, be it at the bachelor party or not.

    FI joined in on a bachelor party a couple years ago and it went like this: started early in the morning with breakfast, then golfing for the day, supper, strip club then to another bar. FI texted me most of the day and while he was at the strip club and the guys were getting a private dance, he went outside to call me. I actually ended up going to said strip club later with a friend of mine (I knew one of the bouncers) without knowing they were still there (FI told me they were leaving, but hadn't yet) and the guys (5 sheets to the wind) literally came and gave me huge hugs... not something you'd expect during a bachelor party when one of the GF's show up. So even though FI stated he doesn't want one, if his friend's kidnap him (which I wouldn't be surprised) I wouldn't be sitting at home worrying the whole time because I know he'll be having a good time with the guys!

     
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    bree72    December 31, 2008  

    @Miss Tattoo: You crack me up sometimes. You know it because of the song, don't you? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2cne1CmswU (WARNING: this is in no way work or child appropriate; but it's still really funny).

     
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    teaadntoast    04/23/2010   New York, NY

    @ijustrockout:  O_o.

    My husband is a real man, too, and he would never refer to women of any occupation as disgusting or subhuman.

     
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    RSgrl1215    December 3, 2011   Maryland

    This article actually pisses me off. I am so grateful to have a guy that doesnt like Strip Clubs and Strippers. He wants NO part in his Bachelor party if his guys plan on going that route. Although FI has already expressed thats not what he wants AT ALL. His choice and im so appreciative of that. I think that any female that knows a guy is married, engaged or has a girlfriend that will just give a guy sex, oral or any of that is disgusting and have no morals. I understand they are trying to make a living, but thats just down right GROSS.

     
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    assilem    July 30, 2011  

    @teaadntoast: I second that!

    If a guy referred to a woman he didn't even know as a subhuman disgusting individual I'd assume that he hadsome serious mommy issues, a deep hatred of women, and rapist/serial killer potential.  But I guess some women like that sort of thing!

    In regards to the article...it's Marie Claire.  It's a less trashy version of Cosmo.  I don't take anything printed in that magazine seriously.

     
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    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    @Cash000: lol swass.

     
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    o0olibelulao0o    April 14, 2012   Texas Hill Country

    I haven't read the article (and I won't) because Marie Claire is a horrible magazine.  They wrote an article on healthy living bloggers and how UNHEALTHY they are, suggesting that they have eating disorders and are addicted to working out and are terrible examples of healthy women.  Apparently Marie Claire has never actually looked at their magazine and realized that their -00 sized models (on every page) aren't great "models of health" either.  Pot calling kettle black? yea I think so.

    Ever since that article came out I have boycotted Marie Claire.  I'm sure that article is ridiculous, just like the article they wrote on the tv show Mike & Molly (starring two overweight actors and shows a blossoming relationship between overweight people) being gross and uncomfortable to watch.

     
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    ijustrockout    August 7, 2011   isle of palms, sc.

    yes, you're right. i'm marrying a serial killer with mommy issues. you girls on here are so brilliant.

     
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    Gingersnap    August 2000   Ontario, Canada

    @ijustrockout: You do realize some members of WB are strippers right?

     

     
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    teaadntoast    04/23/2010   New York, NY

    @ijustrockout:  Probably not.

    But it's a wee bit disconcerting when someone uses words like "subhuman" to describe a group of people based on what they do for a living.

     
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    DeathByDesign    February 18, 2012   Lives in Ontario, married in Quebec

    First, I don't think all bachelor parties are like this. My FI is planning a weekend at a cottage with his best guy friends for fishing, drinking games and other male things like that. Likewise, my bachelorette party is going to be a day at the spa and afternoon tea.

    I think it's gross that some men think it's perfectly okay to cheat on their future wives at a bachelor party. I also find it annoying that many guys would encourage a groom to do that kind of crap at their party. It's even more annoying when everyone thinks the bride is strict and the groom is whipped if he doesn't at least kiss another women before marrying. It's just stupid.

    I doubt these guys would be okay if they found out their fiance cheated on them 3 days before their wedding day. I don't think "Oh but honey it was a right of passage!" would hold any water.

     
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    oyster    July 2010   Dallas

    @teaadntoast: Agreed. 

    Well, at least no one is posting that they're more frightened of their FH's bachelor party because of this article! I wonder if the authors know just how biased and faux-journalistic this article seems. 

    I quit reading women's magazines a few years ago, and I've never been more relaxed. These things are literally making money from our fears and insecurities. Terrible! 

     
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    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    @ijustrockout: i feel fortunate to have a REAL man that said: "strippers (aka prostitutes) and the like are subhuman, disgusting individuals that i want no parts of."

    No matter who or what your husband is - that comment is entirely rude and inappropriate.  To me it shows a huge level of immaturity - to judge and put down people you've never even met.

    And as a PP said, you do know that there are girls on WB who are/were strippers, right?

     
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    ijustrockout    August 7, 2011   isle of palms, sc.

    you do realize that i don't care, right?

    i'm not going to lie and tip-toe around to spare every persons' feelings on the internet, least of all, strippers. sorry.

     

     
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    Gingersnap    August 2000   Ontario, Canada

    @Mrs.KMM: THIS completely. To me, having your husband say that means he is much less of a "real man" than those who acknowledge that strippers are not these nasty men-stealing women, but just normal everyday women doing their jobs.

    (Wtf does that even mean anyways? Do the rest of us have imaginary men?)

     

     
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    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    Alright! Let's just let ijustrockout believe every stripper is subhuman and move on. I'm sure she only said it to cause a reaction. She's entitled to her opinion, no matter how immature it is.

     
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    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    @ijustrockout: "i'm not going to lie and tip-toe around to spare every persons' feelings on the internet, least of all, strippers."

    Apparently you share your SO's sentiments ....

     
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    DeathByDesign    February 18, 2012   Lives in Ontario, married in Quebec

    @Miss Tattoo: Yeah. 

     
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    amnystik    April 9, 2011   Texas

    Just to add...

    I think the problem with the content of the article is the excepted behavior of the MEN portrayed.. not the "prostitutes or strippers"

    One of my favorite quotes what it comes to those selling themselves is:

    "You don't know what put the prostitute on the corner."

    I've personally known girls who have both stripped and/or prostituted themselves and not once have a found someone who would fall into the catergory proposed as "sub-human"....

    Really I don't think anyone falls into this category... and I've read about some pretty horrific people throughout history....

    Just saying ;)

     
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    teaadntoast    04/23/2010   New York, NY

    @ijustrockout:  No one asked you to lie.

    That basic decency is too much to ask of you is, um, troubling, though.

    Syaing whatever you like from behind a screen without pausing to consider other people's feelings doesn't mean you're tough or brave or smart or savvy or especially intelligent.  It means you're insensitive, self righteous and lacking in empathy.

     
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    Lovemyfuturehub    July 7, 2012   Boston, MA

    That article literally made me sick... ugh

     

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