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Well, right now, my younger brother is the beneficiacy of my life insurance policy. I had done that before I was dating FI, and wanted to make sure he was always taken care of regardless. Now that he's over 18 and I'm getting married, I'll make it FI. Once we have kids, that'll be another story.
I think I'll set things up like my parents did. They had an executor (a very close family friend) who were also set up to be our legal guardians if we were under 18. They had the right to sell anything, but all the proceeds would go to a trust until the last child completed college. The funds would then be split between myself, my siblings and them (to reimburse them for costs incurred raising three children).
I think if you have a spouse, most of it generally gets left to the spouse, since s/he will obviously be taking care of your children and supporting them still. But there are, of course, a million ways to divide this all up and it's a lot to think about!
I think leaving more money to the kids is normal IMO. The spouse can always work and make their own money but the kids arent always in a goo position to do that. Plus atleast that way they will be able to go to college if they choose.
DH and I don't have a will. To be honest, we don't really see a need for it. If something happened to one of us, the other would automatically get everything, which is fine by us (of course, I would give some of DH's things to his family and vice versa). If something happened to both of us, our families get along and would be able to sort it out. Right now it's not like we have a ton of assests. We may reassess after buying a house or something. There are no plans for kids right now, but if we had kids I would be more interested in having a will.
We have assigned successors and beneficiaries on some of our investments.
DH has been bugging me to talk to my parents about whether or not they have a will and who is the executor. I agree with him, but it's so awkward to bring up (and I don't live in the same city). My parents taught me about money to an extent, but when it came to personal finances they were quite private.
We're in a transitional phase, but we're currently working on setting up a family trust, that will bee beneficiary to all of our life insurance, retirement, social security, investment, etc... The way it will work, I think, is that my husband and I are technically the "trustess," but should anything happen to both of us, our children will be entitled to everything. In that case, we'll set up some kind of clause so that my sister-in-law can preside over the trust until our kids come of age.
I work in HR and I take care of all the beneficiary paperwork for our employees. I'd say it's just as common for our employees to leave everything to a spouse as it is to leave everything to their children. It really depends on the unique situation, but how your husband has it set up is pretty common, in my experience.
Sad to think about, but very important question...
Right now we have it set up so that we are eachother's beneficiaries on all our investments, insurance, etc. Our will is set up so that if one of us dies, then the other spouse takes over all the finances.
However if both of us were to die, then his brother becomes executor and our children get everything. My sisters will become the legal custodians of our children.
But we are eachother's first spouse and we have no children from prior relationships so our situation isn't as complex. In your FI's defense, I would want my kids to have as much of my existing net worth as possible whether I remarried or not. But in all fairness to you, at the minimum I think it would be wise to for him to reconsider the "small" life insurance policies for each of you, and get added to his pension for sure (which you are already doing).
100% will go to my husband.
If both of us die, 100% will go to our (future) children or 50/50 our parents.
I do believe in passing down wealth though. I believe in giving children their money when they're 25 so that they can start a business, buy a house etc. If kids are 65 when their parents die, they don't really need the money anymore.
I don't have a will yet. Maybe when we have kids! I believe I've listed my mom as my beneficiary on my bank accounts....but I don't even know that for sure.
Thanks bee's! Love your thoughts & stories!!
One last thing to throw out... I believe he should take care of his kids too without a doubt!!!!
But buy giving them them farm and me the chevette. Lol. I am feeling a less cared for.
Please keep in mind he already has a substantial account put away for their education. Not even talking about that. This is an extra policy on top of that one for a million also soley just for them. His pension is not very much...
My feelings are my Fi is just as much my number 1 as my kids. So why treat them different?
Honestly I'd probably still leave him more. But at the very least I'd split it equally to those who mean the most to me... Him and the kids..
Thanks bee's! Love your thoughts & stories!!
One last thing to throw out... I believe he should take care of his kids too without a doubt!!!!
But buy giving them them farm and me the chevette. Lol. I am feeling a less cared for.
Please keep in mind he already has a substantial account put away for their education. Not even talking about that. This is an extra policy on top of that one for a million also soley just for them. His pension is not very much...
My feelings are my Fi is just as much my number 1 as my kids. So why treat them different?
Honestly I'd probably still leave him more. But at the very least I'd split it equally to those who mean the most to me... Him and the kids..
Thanks bee's! Love your thoughts & stories!!
One last thing to throw out... I believe he should take care of his kids too without a doubt!!!!
But buy giving them them farm and me the chevette. Lol. I am feeling a less cared for.
Please keep in mind he already has a substantial account put away for their education. Not even talking about that. This is an extra policy on top of that one for a million also soley just for them. His pension is not very much...
My feelings are my Fi is just as much my number 1 as my kids. So why treat them different?
Honestly I'd probably still leave him more. But at the very least I'd split it equally to those who mean the most to me... Him and the kids..
Money is to split between my spouse and BF. Now if FH and I die together, then it all goes to my BF. Why? Because I run a cat sanctuary and I can trust my BF to use the money to keep the sanctuary in operation.
DH is the beneficiary of my life insurance policy. We don't have much to our names but as of right now we've left everything to each other. We have one child on the way and he has a daughter but I didn't put her as a beneficiary because I know DH will make sure a good portion of the money will be spent on her. Once we have more money and assests we will probably divide things up specifically among all the kids in the case that both of us pass. Not that half siblings can't compromise on these things, but I want to make sure it's fair and they all get an equal amount without any arguments.
For now I'm fine with DH handling the money if I'm gone, I trust him.
Just a follow up. I want to thank all of you for your input. I really appreciate it!!!
We talked and it wasn't what I thought he was going to do. I am happy to say he feels exactly like me. Our kids will be taken care of with schooling and insurance and everything else we build and have built will be shared with us. So the business and everything will we willed to me. Which to me is the true essence of a couple. I make a fairly healthy living that will be getting much better soon and I plan on leaving my investments to him as well. So all is good.
Have a great day bees!!! : )
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Good day bees. : )
Question regarding sensitive issue... Life insurance policy's, beneficiaries, etc .. Especially for encore older established bees and bees who have children from other relationships or are with people with children of other relationships.
My FI is pretty established. We have lived together last 2 years & are in process of joining all ur funds etc. I'm self employed but work is tough for me in ths economy & FI is helping support me right now. In a good economy Im typically a high income earner.
Currently he has good education investments establishedfor his 2 kids from his prior marriage. He as a million dollar insurance for them they are currently on as beneficiaries for his pension from before he was self employed & they get his half of an established business. Probably worth at least half a mill.we are meeting with lawyers soon to make me new beneficiary of his pension.
Is this normal to provide really really well for kids & peanuts forspouse or am I being 2nd of importance?
What do you do & what do your spouses do? Would love to hear from bees actually in thithis intubation
O and he's thinking of doing small life insurance policies for each of us.
I know if able to afford it I'd have enough out away to cover kids education & other policies I would personally leave money to all my kids but I'd leave more to my spouse. That's me.
Last question. Who is executor of your will? Spouse or family member ?