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Totally random....
I'm 24, SO is 30...
I hate that I can really only call him my 'boyfriend'....He's obv not much of a boy (excluding mentality)
Am I alone on this??
haha i can understand it - i didn't mind boyfriend too much - Fiance was just weird to me, i always just felt so strange saying "my fiance". i wanted to skip straight to husband haha.
@jpalm13: It doesn't bother me personally. I still call my FI my boyfriend quite often even though I could call him my fiance. (Fiance just seems like boasting I guess.)
But, if it bothers you that much, you have some options. You can call him your partner or your significant other.
I'm there! For me, it's more that we've been together long enough (3 years) that boyfriend just doesn't seem to fit. We're a lot more serious than that and when I call him my "boyfriend," I immediately feel 12. I usually call him my partner, haha.
Nope, not alone. I'm right there with you. My finacee (this also makes me go "ugh" when I say it).. is 39. But another few months and I get to avoid both!
It didn't bother me. FI thought it was weird to call each other fiances. He wanted to stick to girlfriend or call me wife to be. Haha. Such a dork. He's gotten used to it. We've been engaged a year (tomorrow!)
It didnt bother me at first but after around the 4 year mark it started to feel silly. It makes you sound young right?? Plus after all that time together it deff felt like we were much more than boyfriend/girlfriend! We got engaged after 5.5 years, we were 24 and 28 so I totally understand where you're coming from!!
Although I will say I don't like using fiance either, so sometimes I still call him my boyfriend. I'd like to skip straight to husband!
It doesn't bother me (I'm 29, SO is 31, been together 1.5 years). I dunno, it's what we are. Now, if he's still my boyfriend 5 years from now it'll probably start to feel a little ridiculous, but for where we are now it feels like the right thing to call it.
Its just feels funny lol. He's clearly an adult but I refer to him as a boy?
Partner is a bit off base for us I think... and significant other is just so much work! haha
We're both almost 21 and it feels weird saying it. It doesn't really feel too young to me, it just doesn't sound serious enough to represent what we are to each other and what we've experienced together haha (:
@eliwhit: haha my grandma used to call her boyfriend her 'gentlemen friend' until they got married a couple years ago ;)
@Lemma: Yes - this! I hate saying finace because I feel like I'm bragging and I sound ridiculous!
I'd rather say boyfriend or husband. I go back and forth between calling him both of those things just so I don't have to say fiance, haha.
@sugarpea: Oh Gentleman friend! I like that. My grandma tried to switch me to "beau"...
That being said, OP, I totally hear you! I used to feel silly sometimes, too, saying "my boyfriend" in my later twenties. We got engaged when I was 29 after 4 years and I was definitely ready for it.
I felt silly calling my husband my boyfriend. I love that I can call him my husband now.
I feel childish calling my SO my boyfriend sometimes because I feel like we are so much more. There needs to be a middle ground between boyfriend and fiance....a 'preance' perhaps :)
It bothers me most when I'm talking at work about the plans my SO and I have for our future. I think people don't take me seriously when I say things about my boyfriend and I having kids one day, etc.
I actually preferred it over fiancé, I don't know why but fiancé seems like such a weird word to me. Lol
I don't like the term boyfriend for a few reasons. One is that he isn't a "boy" as the OP mentioned. I prefer to say "partner" or "significant other". I feel that partner describes our relationship much better. Boyfriend sounds very trivial to me, and he is my partner in life.
@girlygirl885: I totally agree! (: I think that people take our relationship plans seriously and then they hear 'boyfriend' and don't think we mean it or we're just in a fantasy 'love bubble'
I hated it mostly because we have a child together. I get a completely different reaction when I say "boyfriend" as opposed to "fiance".
I agree that "boyfriend" sounds trivial and fleeting-- 14 year olds have boyfriends.
LOL, I never cared for it but it was because I went from having a husband one year and the next year I had to say boyfriend when I started dating again after DH died. I felt like a teenager again!! I also don't care for the word 'fiance'...it sounds way to fancy for us hahaha. Usually I just refer to him by name...if someone doesn't know who 'Chris' is THEN I'll elaborate.
I'm not sure I like the term boyfriend anymore either. Like others have said it seems very 13 year old to me. That being said SO told me today that I was "the best girlfriend ever" which is sweet don't get me wrong but the only thing I could think of was "I don't want to be the girlfriend anymore, I want to be the fiancee."
I still call my FI my boyfriend haha. So it doesn't bother me much. It's kinda...strange calling him my fiancee. Maybe because I'm 23 and feel so young or because living at home with my mom actually makes me feel like I'm 14, but I prefer calling him my boyfriend still after 9 months of being engaged.
Like other, fiance was just too weird for us. We hated call each other "my fiance/e" - it just sounds ridiculous! I much prefer boyfriend to that, but husband is the best :)
A few months after we first started dating, I was 17, I started referring to him as my partner, and now 5 years later he is my fiancé and I still call him partner. partner works for us, we may even say partner after we are married.
@girlygirl885: I completely agree! I hate the word boyfriend because when you talk about any future plans they look at you like your crazy, because obviously he is going to break up with you in the next few days! Haha. My SO and I are going on 5 years in January, I am so OVER the term boyfriend!
I just call him by his name and let the 'labels' go. Before we were engaged I felt stupid calling him my 'boyfriend' because he is too old for that! And I feel wierd calling him my fiance, but I do occasionally, since I only have 6 months left of being able to say that! Husband will be the best.
I don't mind the term boyfriend at all. In fact when we get engaged I will still call him my boyfriend because I hate the term fiance, to me it sounds stuck up.
We're both 22 and pre-engagement, I HATED the word boyfriend! We lived together, had joint finances, and plans to purchase a ring but then I had to introduce him as my boyfriend? I didn't like it.
I'm with you. SO is 33. We're in a serious, commited relationship. Boyfriend is just so, not right with me. Like PPs have said, I'm not in school!! His brother introduces me as "partner", which is better, but I can't wait until it's WIFE! :)
haha I have a good story about how uncomfortable boyfriend/girlfriend labels can be. My mom works at a dental office. When my SO and I started dating he began going to her office because his original dentist's office burned down. So he has been going to my mom's office for a few years and they all know that he is my SO. Well the other day he had a tooth problem so he called up the office and left them a message to see if he could get in to be seen.
This was his message:
Hi this is ______ ______, MissCallieJean's...um...(5 second pause) friend.
My SO and I both don't like the fiancé/e thing, either.. I don't feel "boyfriend" is childish, so much as it's fleeting. We were together 2 years before getting engaged and did the whole boy-/girlfriend thing, and now we're engaged and I'm 29 and he's 30 and I refer to him as "my man". He refers to me as his girl, and I like that a lot :) Nice and simple!
Oh PS. The "Gentleman Friend" and "Beau" stories are adorable! Haha aww! :D
LOL@MissCallieJean :D Yeah, I just use fiancé in these situations :D
@KMsBride: I've kinda drifted into just saying 'my man.'
I think I really got turned off from "boyfriend" when my 8 year old sister (at the age of 7 though and yes I have an 8 yr old sister lol) told me that she broke up with her boyfriend because he wanted to hold hands and she didn't love him....damn near lost it laughing but it was an "OMG my youger sister has a boyfriend and so do I....wow" moment haha
@jpalm13: That's tooooo cute about your sister! :D Yeah, that would have sent me into 'Boyfriend' epiphany moment, too LOL
After age 40 it really becomes weird! Around here you'll here the terms "gentlemanfriend" and "ladyfriend" a lot with the older crowd. (At 45 I consider myself part of the older crowd.) You may hear SO used as well. Some people will say "my friend" but they say it in a kind of singsongy way so that you know it is a romantic friendship.
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