Post # 1
Fiance and I are having a very small and simple ceremony with about 50 guests and are not planning to have any BM/GM, but he has two nieces for whom he is essentially a father figure. I want to include them in the ceremony but am struggling with how.
They are just-turned 9 and 11 years old and very girly/innocent. When told we weren’t having bridesmaids, the eldest asked to be a flower girl (I have a 4-year-old who will be a perfect flower girl) and the youngest asked if there was such as thing as a “Ring Girl” (we’re considering a ring-warming ceremony so we may not even need anyone to carry the rings). I can’t make them junior bridesmaids because I we’re not planning on any attendants, but I get the feeling they really want to do something that involves walking down the aisle or being up front (they adore both me and my Fiance, and are just so excited we are getting married).
So far I’ve thought:
1. I could name the eldest a “Senior Flower Girl” to accompany the 4-year-old. What to do with the younger one? Accompany the ring-bear (if we need one)?
2. Have them both be our honorary attendants – one walks in with Fiance, stands in the Groomsmen position and receives the rings after a carrier/warming; other one precedes me down the aisle as an honorary bridesmaid and holds my bouqet when needed. Having them standing there behind us without anyone to keep them in line throughout the 30-minute service makes me a little worried, even though they’re great kids. Maybe have them join the processional but sit in the front row until they are needed…?
3. Find tasks such as guestbook, ushering (with someone to coordinate them), unrolling an aisle runner, etc?
Any other ideas…? They are sweet, poised girls and would be a wonderful addition to the ceremony; I just don’t know how to include them…
Post # 3
Firstly, I don’t think they are “too old” to be flower girls per se There is no real age limit and if the oldest suggested it, that means she’s okay with being an eleven year old flower girl. So, Why not just have 3 flower girls and let them sit after they do the tossing? I don’t think this will be too many girls especially since you have no other attendants. Or, have one of the girls carry the rings in for the ring warming and then carry them back to the officiant after. I think they might me too young to usher or help with the guest book, and unrolling the aisle runner is not very glamorous lol. Good luck deciding. Personally, I plan on having no attendants and 4 flower girls 🙂
Post # 4
I would also just have 3 flower girls.
Post # 5
Are you doing any kind of special ceremonies withing your ceremony?
In mexican weddings there’s a Lasso ceremony: a large eight shaped loop of cord or rosary beads is placed around the couple’s shoulders. There are Lasso bearers in this case.
If you’re planning a wine box ceremony for instance you cna have one of them to carry the box.
Post # 6
Thanks, I like the three flower girls idea.
@Coffee cup: I didn’t know about the Lasso carriers! We haven’t talked yet about including the Lasso, but I’ve been thinking about that because while my SI is very Americanized (father had immigrant grandparents), his mother is a Mexican immigrant who is rather traditional. It would be so cool to have them as Lasso carriers…
Keep the ideas coming, everyone! Thank you!
Post # 7
I’m having 2 flower girls are they will both be 9 at the time of the wedding
Post # 8
I would go for 3 flower girls. One of the prettiest (and slightly quirky) weddings I’ve seen had an adult as “flower girl”, she was a ballerina and danced down the aisle and the pictures were incredible.
That might lend some dignity to the position: do the girls dance at all?
Honestly, if one of the girls asked: then I wouldn’t turn her down.
Post # 9
If you want the girls to do something like scattering flower petals, it may be easiest to have the older girls do it. Not sure how well 4 year old would follow directions, but you can have the older girls help her with it.
They could also help with things like passing out bubbles/birdseed, holding your bouquet, the rings, etc.
Post # 10
I too am having no bm or moh, but two fgs (3&5), and my dad wants me to include my 8yr old soon to be step sister. I really had no desire to, just wanted the other 2 but think I will have to.
I would have her do a reading but she still talks in baby talk frequently and Fiance and I cringe st thst thought so fg it is.
Could they do readings?
Post # 11
I’m liking the idea of three flower girls more and more! I think with the older girls still being so innocent and sweet, I could easily find a dress that would work for all three. Like this: http://www.amazon.com/Ivory-Organza-Tiered-Dress-1152/dp/B000MOLO5Y/ref=sr_1_29?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1335502786&sr=1-29
@Snow00774: One of them MIGHT want to do a reading, but not the other (she’s shy when it comes to talking).
Post # 12
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I know you said you wanted them in the ceremony, but what about having them hand out programs, or at the reception, being guest book attendants?
Post # 13
Could they be usherettes? Have them hand out programs and seat guests. Then they can walk down the aisle before the parents of the bride and groom.