thinking about not having a shower or bachelorette party

posted 3 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
3047 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

As a fellow DW bride, this is what we’ll do – two days before the wedding we’ll have an activity day. Basically, we’ll split up and then our friends/family can just pick whomever they want to spend their day with. White water rafting with FI or learn to bake traditional bread with me. At the end of the day, we’ll all meet up for dinner and wine. It’s not a traditional bachelor/bachelorette party – but it works nicely based on the circumstances. Perhaps you could do something similar while on site?

Post # 4
Member
2057 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

@eocenia:  This is an awesome idea! I love baking-related activities; it creates many bonding opportunities.

@BeeG35:  I’m in a similar situation, except that I’m perfectly fine with not receiving any gifts. FI and I have a house together. My mother originally had wanted to throw an at-home reception/casual dinner for guests who couldn’t go, but if she does, that’s her plan; not mine. She’s got every right to see our extended families and her friends since she’d be travelling over 10,000 kms to attend our wedding. I was actually secretly horrified that my FMIL was planning to throw me a shower — to which I had originally assumed it would be for FI’s brother’s fiancee.

My best-friend/MOH feels bad for not being able to throw a hens’ night (as she lives in another continent/country 15,000 kms away). Honestly though, I have never seen engagement/bridal showers/bachelorette parties to be traditional. I mean, as funny as it would be (imagining) receiving a dildo-shaped cake pan, I would dread the creativity required to decorate the cake to make it kid-friendly/clean.

FI and I have been telling people that their attendance is present enough — as they would have to pay for their own accomodation. 🙂

Post # 5
Member
3047 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Cynderbug: It also works nicely as it allows older guests, like my grandma, and people that can’t do anything highly active (like one of our guests that had a baby 2 months ago) to participate and learn something new! 

& I so agree on the “Honestly though, I have never seen engagement/bridal showers/bachelorette parties to be traditional” part! We did the engagement party because it happened to be one of the things that was asked in the paperwork for me to apply for landed immigrant status – before that I had never heard of such a thing! 

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