(Closed) This is weird

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3640 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@GwenvonD: Some people just have a sexual aura (that sounds a bit fruity but you know what I mean). It’s natural to be attracted to/get a vibe from people other than your SO. I wouldn’t worry about it because no one has done anything they shouldn’t have. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
4804 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012
Post # 5
Member
4804 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I wouldn’t worry about it too much.  Obviously after hearing that your mind is going to go there!  p.s. “Apparently” he is like that?  How does your coworker know?Wink

Post # 6
Member
3587 posts
Sugar bee

Yeah, just don’t think about it. I agree, how does your friend know? Details!LOL

Post # 8
Member
82 posts
Worker bee

Oh most definitely……met a guy at work one day, instant major attraction, were talking, jaw drop, speechless for a moment, and no, nothing out of a magazine,no ripped abs, no hot tats (love a man in tats ๐Ÿ˜‰  just total, pure sexual attraction – how the hell does that happen ?

Well the game went on for 5 very long years, the flirting, the tease, the blushing, the omg if I look at him he will be able to read my thoughts (naughty naughty) and than after the long wait, my than husband walked (no love loss there) and within 3 weeks, this guy and I were on it like dogs in heat lmao, for 7 months, it was fabulous and more than I ever thought it would be !!! No regrets, none, nada, zip, zero, it was 7 of the most fun, happy, easy going, delightful, fantasy filled months of my life!! Till this day, we can not be friends on FB, we emailed once and he is now married and said, he could not do this, way too much temptation, but that during the first few years of his marriage, when things were rough going, he often would drive by my place, thinking it would resolve all his problems, but he knew in his heart, it was the wrong thing to do. I agreed, as I know if he were to show up on my front door step this minute, well, there would be fireworks in April ๐Ÿ˜‰ ~ 

That type of physical attraction only happens once in a lifetime !!! So glad I got to experience that wild ride ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol (blush) hahaha

Post # 9
Member
3587 posts
Sugar bee

@GwenvonD: I get this with older men. Like 39/40 yr olds. I don’t know why.LOL (I’m 30, so it’s not too bad.)

Post # 10
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@GwenvonD:  I think it’s totally normal to have crushes – but, I think when you realize they are happening, it’s time to set boundaries… meaning, if I start thinking about the crush too much, etc – I know it’s going into territory that’s inappropriate and I need to back off.  Only you can know what that line is for yourself, but if you feel that you are approaching it – I’d just back off a bit from the friendship at work.  Sounds like he likes the flirtatious relationship he has with you and showing you his tattoo is pretty intimate considering you are co-workers.  

Post # 11
Member
4887 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Also agree with PP that you should consider cutting ties with this guy.  It can be dangerous, especially in such close proximity.  Your emotions might also be a little unstable right now since you’re also dealing with the apartment situation – maybe it’s making this man more attractive to you than he really is, you know?

Post # 12
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@Doubtful:that’s awesome you were able to experience that!! hubs and I actually had that in the beginning – the whole “friends with benefits” thing before we got married. we couldn’t keep our hands off of each other, and at one point, it was the ONLY thing that kept us from walking away forever.  I couldn’t imagine life without him now, and sometimes wish we could go back to the way things were (sexually) but there is just not near enough time for it anymore!

Post # 13
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@GwenvonD: I think a lot of us are probably in the same boat.

I have a friend through business, who makes me blush too. There’s a flirty vibe and although I would never do anything, I wonder of course about what’s going on downstairs LOL. I love the hubby and would never do anything, but I think it’s ok to have little crushes regardless of your status.

Post # 14
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

And Gwen, its not totally un-normal for that to happen. It happened with a really good friend of mine a long time ago. I even spent my birthday night with him cuz he had gotten into an accident on his way to pick me up to go out (and we were both in relationships!). Nothing happened between us, besides making out on the dancefloor at a club once, which i told my then bf about.  But then, he joined the military, and I only talked to him through texts and emails every once in a while.  He’s survived 3 tours in Afghanistan, and will be home 5/1. We are going to go to lunch after that, and haven’t seen each other in about 6 years.  I don’t expect any of that attraction anymore, we’re both married and he has a baby on the way. We were both young and didn’t really have any hard consequences to face if anything really did happen, and now we both have grown up a lot, and very differently since we last saw each other.

I guess the point of all that was to say, as long as you don’t cross the line, its fine. But if you feel that line being crossed, then you need to have a talk with him. 

Post # 15
Member
3402 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Maybe I’m the only one here who thinks this way but…

It’s one thing to see someone & know someone whom you find attractive, but for a crush to form seem like a major boundry cross to me. If I found out my SO has a little crush on someone I wouldn’t be thrilled (AT ALL!). I think finding someone attractive is a little different then wonder what is going on in their pants and blushing everytime they come near..

 

Post # 16
Member
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

OH MY GOD I am the EXACT same way with one of my coworkers!! I would never in a million years consider cheating on my SO, and truthfully I’m not even truly attracted to my coworker, but like @Tickles said, he has that “sexual aura” and I get all tongue-tied and nervous and klutzy around him as if I have a crush on him, and I avoid looking at him if at all possible because I just get that sexual vibe and I feel like he “knows” that I am thinking it. He’s leaving the company though and his last day is tomorrow so I am so glad that the awkwardness will be over soon.

I’m so glad I’m not the only person that this happens to haha. I seriously thought I was the only one.

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