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FMIL in the Bride Room

This is why women go bridezilla!

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
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    1.
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    Helper bee
    SaraRocks    October 16, 2010   Baltimore, MD

    So, having a major freak out moment, my wedding is in 6 WEEKS!!!! Looking at my to-do list, everything is something that I need someone else to do!I understand this is not the most important day in everyone elses life, but come guys, if you say you are going to help out with something f-ing help out!!!

    - 3 of my 5 bridesmaids don't have dresses yet! I tried to make this as easy as possible, go pick out a blue dress and silver shoes. I don't care what color blue, what length, etc. it just can't be blue-green and it can't be blue-purple!

    - My mom is helping me out with the lady at our yacht club,. mostly because she doesn't seem to like me and my mom gets along with her fine. Well, my mom is supposed to send her the recipe for the vegetarian meal and argue with her about setting up chairs for the ceremony (they are trying to tell us we would have to rent the chairs. not happening.)

    - My friend is making our cake which is super nice of her and I do appreciate her efforts! But, I haven't heard anything from her! She said she was going to test out a couple of flavors to see what worked the best. I need that flavor to finalize menus!!

    ok, after typing all that out, it's not really as bad as it seems. I just need to get organized and hunt down a couple of people. Hooray for another "lazy" Sunday....

     
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    Sugar bee
    mandb122    March 6, 2011   Temporarily in Minnesota, From South Carolina, Wedding in Charleston

    I'm just approaching six months out and I know how you feel.  I can't stand it when people tell me "oh there's time, we have time".  That is one of my least favorite quotes from people during the process, especially when we had bridesmaids.  We decided to make the wedding much smaller so just a man of honor and best man but one of my bridesmaids before actually told me she didn't want to get her dress too soon and she'd see what she could find about three weeks before the wedding.  As for the cake, I'd look up bakeries in the area just to have a backup if you need to put that into motion about three weeks before the wedding.

     
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    Bumble bee
    JenniMichele    May 22, 2011   Huntington Beach, CA

    Oh I totally know how you feel. One of my BM's told me once when I was talking about wedding planning with her, "Oh and you have the number 1 greatest resource-- ME." Ummmmm, no. Every time you have offered to do something and I took you up on the offer, I never heard back from you.

    "Ohh I'll get you a price list from soandso." Never heard about that again.
    "Ohh I'll talk to my step mom about flower arrangements." Never heard about that again.
    "Ohh I'll ask soandso about doing your make up & hair." Never heard about that again.

    This list could go on and on. And these are things she offered to do-- I have not asked her to do a single thing. And she lives at my house! So it's not like it's "out of sight, out of mind"-- I see her everyday. I've since stopped talking to her about wedding planning.

    So I just decided FH & I are doing everything ourselves. Now we don't have to worry about relying on unreliable people.

    I'm sorry you're stressing today-- I hope it all comes together beautifully on your wedding day.

     
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    Blushing bee
    futuremrscrawford    October 2, 2010   NYC

    OH HO HO HOHO -- you @mandb112 and @jennimichele have NO IDEA.  All of you 2011 weddings can't post on this stress.

    @sararocks  you're in good shape.  I'm 2 weeks earlier than you -- and have just as long of a to-do list.  Some vendors don't want to even talk yet.  It's SO FRUSTRATING!!

    But I think it's normal sararocks.  we'll both have beautiful weddings:-)

     
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    Miss Sparklespaniel    November 13, 2010   VIC, Australia

    Planning a wedding is at times a stressful and frustrating experience. In my experience one of the most annoying parts of it all is having people tell you "Oh, you've got plenty of time" and that you shouldn't be worrying/stressing/feeling how you feel because you're wedding isn't close enough.

     
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    Bumble bee
    Brianalaura    August 14, 2010   Ontario, Canada

    It is really frustrating when people tell you "You have time".  We were running around doing stuff the day before (and even the day of - I hadn't finished the menu to sit on the bar, and I ran inside during cocktail hour and slapped it together).  But if you are over-stressed, remember that it will all get done, and if it doesn't, c'est la vie!  It saved me some extra stress.

     
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    Busy bee
    afuturemrsl    July 30, 2011   Massachusetts

    Eh. I am sorry you are so stressed. If you still haven't heard from your friend, I would do the menus and just write wedding cake - forget the flavors. It will be a surprise!

     
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    Helper bee
    TwinkleToesJMU    July 3, 2010  

    This is totally normal. There is something called "bride time" and "everyone else's" time. People who are helping out with the wedding planning never quite understand all the stress and pressue a bride feels in the weeks coming up to the wedding.

    The only thing that helps ease the stress is knowing that things are taken care of and in their proper place. Unforutnetly, your friends and family don't operate on bridal time. of course your friend is waiting till the last minute to get her dress, thats what people do! i have no doubt that the majority of my family waited until the week of the wedding to get a hotel, buy a gift, etc.

    Also, my dad was in charge of ordering all the alcohol. He did it the day before the wedding. If it were me, I would have ordered the alchol like 6 months in advance, and then called 50 times to ensure the order was correct. My advice is to breathe easy and know that people will get everything done in time for the wedding, but its not going to be super early like we all hope.

     
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    Beekeeper
    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    Even though we chose our cake flavor months in advance, our menu cards just said "Rittenhouse Wedding Cake" (my wedding was at a hotel called The Rittenhouse and they catered the entire thing). I didn't mind at all, it was fine and not one person mentioned it to me.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    spaganya    September 4, 2010   Arlington, VA/wedding in Williamsburg, VA

    take a deeeeep breath - i have THREE DAYS and theres still stuff that isnt done, but seriously the closer you get you get stressed but you also start doing the WhatEVER!!! song and dance.

    the wedding will be great no matter what. breaaaaaaaaaaaathe :)

     
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    Helper bee
    SaraRocks    October 16, 2010   Baltimore, MD

    Thanks All! I will definitely have to tell people I'm on Bride time in the future!

     
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    daydreamwanderer       DC

    I think writing stuff down can really help :) Even if it is just in a thread to vent! It gives you perspective and helps you prioritize.

    I know you'll get it all done without losing your mind! It's like labor - one more big 45 day push!

     
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    rachelss    August 22, 2010   Fort Collins, CO

    Sounds normal. I had several meltdowns. My bridesmaids didn't get dresses until the last minute (one had a baby 3 weeks before the wedding, one picked out many and couldn't decide) and they still looked gorgeous (they're on my photog's blog - http://blog.adore-photography.com/). Blue dress and silver shoes - same as you. My last-minute bridesmaid literally picked hers out of my closet 5 hours before the wedding (girl to my right).

    It's going to be all right! Check things off your list and it will go smoothly. Our wedding was amazing.

     
    14.
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    Helper bee
    SaraRocks    October 16, 2010   Baltimore, MD

    @rachelss: Aw!! You all look so cute! I love your venue too!

     

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