Post # 1
Those of you who did a whole load of pre engagement planning, did it help you to have a breezy calm fun engagament?
Or did you end up loving the planning and doing a whole more stuff afterward?
My friend has been with her SO for about 5 years, and has done a whole load of planning, even got the dress, chosen her e-ring, venue, prices, guest list, is drafting her order of service and invitations. So when the SO proposes then all she needs to do is press ‘book’ and everything is done. Her SO isnt into wedding plannings and such so he probably wont care.
I’m thinking life doesnt work like that, and she will end up regretting doing all the fun stuff before engagement. But she says it is saving her a load of stress and is practical. They are likely to have a 3 months engagement which she wants to use going to spas, hanging out with SO, and being very calm knowing everything is all sorted.
What do you think?
What would you have done differently? more or less pre planning?
Isnt part of the fun of being a bride all the planning?
Post # 2
Wedding planning was not fun for me at all and caused me a boatload of stress. So I won’t be doing that if I can avoid it this go ’round. Some people love it and others find it stressful. Let your friend do what she wants to do and don’t judge her for it.
Post # 3
Shinytoy : I did a lot of pre planning before I actually had the ring. In the end I didnt use any of the information I had gathered but it was fun and I learned a lot about pricing, how far out to plan, etc.
I dont think its a big deal, is she knows for sure the proposal is coming and it works for her then I think its a great idea.
Post # 4
i knew the engagement was coming so i starting narrowing down venues. we wanted a short engagement. DH only wanted to be involved in food and music. i planned the rest with my mom. the process was very stress free and easy.
Post # 5
If they’re only planning a 3 month engagement, then planning in advance seems practical.
Post # 6
ajillity81 : yeah thats exactly her situation, i guess it makes sense. for me i would totally get bored. i mean, all the planning is one of the most fun parts of being engaged!
Post # 7
Shinytoy : We had a short engagement of 7 months. Obviously not as short as your friend, but we looked at venues before we officially became engaged. We also set a budget and I had a rough guest list since I was engaged previously. It really did make planning that much easier to have this stuff done ahead of time as opposed to starting completely from scratch. I think it’s perfectly fine to have her stuff planned already. Anything to keep her stress down.
Post # 8
Shinytoy : I did a lot of preliminary research on what things cost in general and what vendors were recommended on Wedding Wire and The Knot. Just to get a sense of budget and who to send requests for pricing to once we started planning, but I knew that I wanted a VERY short timeline.
It has not helped a lot, to be honest. In fact, most items I thought I had a good sense of pricing on, were just starting price. Particularly venues b/c I was just considering facility fee & per head food/bev costs…. once we added in premium bar, food upgrades, service charges, taxes, etc., there’s a big jump in cost. We thought we could swing it for $20k but it’s looking more like $25-28k once it’s all said & done. Which we are OK with – well, he is ok with it, I’m silently freaking out.