Post # 1
Fiance and I don’t drink, socially or otherwise. It’s just not for us.
I would really, really, really like to have a dry wedding (FI would, too, but he doesn’t see how it’s possible, socially speaking). Not because I want to impose our choice onto other people, but because the people we’re inviting are drinkers. Heavy drinkers. They drink more so at occasions like weddings.
The caterer we might be going with has an “open bar” for soda, so those wouldn’t cost anything, which we like. They also have a BYOB bar where they supply the bartender and we’d supply the liquor, but I don’t want to be bothered with that. And they have the open bar and cash bar option, too.
My Mom says a cash bar would deter excess drinking, but knowing and having been with these people when there’s a cash bar…I know otherwise.
FI’s father is a very nasty drunk who is loud, obnoxious, rude, and downright mean (I’ve been the recipient of countless mean and rude comments after he’s had drinks in him). In reality, he’s my main concern.
How awful would people respond if we chose to have a dry wedding? I’ve heard horror stories where people didn’t even come to the wedding or reception because of it.
Post # 3
I would just go with your gut. If you feel like drinking is going to be a problem and you don’t want it to ruin your day, then just don’t have it. It’s not about pleasing everyone it’s about you and your Fiance.
Post # 4
I’ve been to lots of dry weddings – it’s fine. If people don’t like it, they can drink afterwards. Just make sure they know where they can go for that (after parties are getting more common, anyway).
Post # 5
trust your instincts and its YOUR wedding if thats how you want it to be, DO IT
Post # 6
I read this tip somewhere about keeping particular guests under control with the bar: give your father in law a special flower and tell the bartender to make his drinks weak. Doesn’t solve your problem about whether to even have a dry wedding, I know, but I thought it was such a creative idea that I would share it in case you decide to have a bar!
Post # 7
I would say definitely go with what you want… but if you want to compromise and be somewhere in the middle, what about having just beer and wine? That way, there won’t be people taking shot after shot getting wasted, but there is still SOMETHING alcoholic for them to drink.
Post # 8
I’ve never been to a dry wedding, so I’d be a little annoyed by it… I know people throw the “I don’t need to drink to have fun” line out there a lot, and I get it… but I enjoy a glass of wine with dinner.
What about having a wine service with dinner, and then the soda bar afterwards? That way you can serve a bit of alcohol, and then know after those bottles are gone, that’s the end of it? How about a fun mocktail signature drink, as well? Non-alcoholic, but something that seems more elegant and grown up than soda?
Post # 9
Would limiting to beer & wine keep Future Father-In-Law in check? Some people can handle beer/wine much better than they handle liquor. And I’d probably at least serve wine with dinner, since your guests do drink, it will be odd for them to not have wine with dinner.
Post # 10
I am all for taking good care of your guests, but if someone is such a small person that they wouldn’t come to your wedding because there is no alcohol, I say you don’t really need them there.
You need to go with what makes you most comfortable, and as long as you provide your guests with plenty of non-alcoholic drinks, it will be just fine without alcohol.
Post # 11
@Beckster329: That is a such a great idea!
Post # 12
@BetterSherm: It is your reception-have it your way! If no alcohol is going to keep people away from your reception, they don’t love you anyway. We are having beer and wine only at our reception. That is a suggestion only. Have what you want, it is your day and your bill.
Post # 13
My cousin just had a dry wedding and although it didn’t bother us, that is her choice, we were bothered that her/husband/the entire bridal party (which was rather large, i think 14 people) Drank on the way to the reception as well as snuck into the bathroom to drink during the reception.
To me, this just made them look cheap. If you’re going to have a dry wedding do it for the right reasons, not because you don’t want to spend the money.
Post # 14
Our wedding had no alcohol and we had tons of fun and dancing. we dont drink and most of our friends and family don’t either so nobody missed the alcohol
Post # 15
- Wedding: February 2013 - Colonial Country Club, Ft. Myers, FL
I think having a dry wedding is a great idea for you!
Maybe you can come up with a signature virgin drink for the wedding, like a flavored lemonade or soda? You can embellish them with fruit, or pretty drink stirrers. That way EVERYONE can enjoy it, drinkers and non-drinkers
Post # 16
My Future Father-In-Law drinks everything under the sun. When push came to shove, he one time had Dr. Pepper, rum, and vodka (through a straw), because of the lack of options and amount of what was left at a party (and that was his 11th drink of the evening, in the span of three hours). And he can’t handle anything, these days. We planned on doing the bottle of champagne at dinner for toasts, but that’s it.