Those who sleep without their FI/DH/SO regularly- LEO, Military, etc

posted 2 years ago in Wellness
Post # 2
Member
8720 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

gingerkitten:  My husband is in the military so he is gone for more than half the year. I DO sleep better when he’s home but if I’m very tired then I fall asleep easily without him. I do have to have had a full day, though. If not then I dont fall asleep until I cant keep my eyes open anymore. I often wonder if something is wrong with that because I slept fine along before being married or not living with someone…

Post # 3
Member
2261 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

gingerkitten:  When I was working mids (1600 to 0200) FI got a little taste of it but that was only for a month and it wasn’t a big deal. 5 months ago I was put on graveyard and that was hard….. I’d get home and the bed would still be warm from him and he had a really really hard time sleeping without me there. We both got a little depressed so I switched back to normal days (7 am to 7 pm) as soon as I was allowed to. 

My only advice is, relax. The more you think about this, the worst it is going to be for you to fall asleep.  His schedule is not something you can control, just chill and remember that in just a few hours, he will get in bed next to you. 

Post # 4
Member
6866 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

My husband works midnights :/ It really sucks and is a big adjustment. I try to unwind for about an hour before bed by watching some tv on the couch and drinking some chamomile tea. It helps that I’ve got 2 dogs that like to cuddle so I let them sleep with me.

Post # 5
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee

My SO is gone for 15 days at a time so I sleep alone a lot. I actually love sleeping alone ( that sounds bad) I get to spread out 🙂

Post # 6
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

we sleep in separate rooms by choice, it helps both of us to fall asleep faster and more soundly. hes a firefighter with 24 hour shifts so it also helps on mornings when he gets up really early.  

Post # 7
Member
332 posts
Helper bee

Mine DH is also a LEO… Not the traditional patrol cop, though. So, he fortunately only has to leave for evenings when he is on call and has an investigation. Which is on a rotation and usually only 2-4 times a week at most. I think it’s harder to fall asleep when you are so used to that person being there, and then they’re suddenly not. 

Once a call comes across the radio when I know he’s next up and will have to go, I’m wide awake. It can be frustrating since I have to be up at 6am for work. The only thing that honestly helps me is popping a melatonin as soon as it happens. Works like a charm. 

Post # 8
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

FI is in emergency management and works 4pm-12am and I work a regular 9-5 so I definitely understand how hard it can be.  We never go to bed or wake up together unless we’re on vacation!  Only real suggestion I have is to maybe try exercising later in the evening so you’re more physically tired.  Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
6026 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I do word games in my head. It’s active thinking enough that I can block out other thoughts, but not challenging enough that it’ll keep me awake. I’ll pick a category, like cities, and a letter of the alphabet, then think of as many cities as I can that start with that letter. I try to think of one “answer” for each time I exhale which helps me slow down my breathing and my thoughts at the same time. Not sure if I am explaining it right but it works very well for me.

Post # 11
Member
6866 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

Horseradish:  I’m so going to try this. Thanks for sharing! Sounds way better than trying to count sheep. Who does that? 

Post # 12
Member
8702 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

My husband is in the Navy. I sleep alone most of the year.<br /><br />I have tried everything. From sleeping pills (Which do work but I don’t want to get a dependancy) to doing math problems and counting sheep.<br /><br />The only thing I’ve found that works is http://www.rainymood.com<br /><br />I put it on, loud enough so I can hear it comfortably, but soft enough that it isn’t destroying my neighbor’s eardrums. I usually have it on my laptop on the floor or table next to the bed or couch.<br /><br />Knocks me right out.

Post # 13
Member
10489 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

A body pillow for comfort and a podcast to help shut my mind off.

Post # 14
Member
567 posts
Busy bee

gingerkitten:  I use a body pillow to snuggle with when hubby is working late or overnight (he’s a railroad conductor) and I also sleep with his pillow right next to me when he isn’t there because it smells like him which is comforting. 

Post # 15
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee

gingerkitten:  I know how you feel.  My SO works away from home every second week and I have trouble sleeping the first couple of nights after he leaves.  I guess I miss the snoring?  Hmm maybe not.

A mug of warm milk generally helps me a lot to feel calm, and like future.mrs.koban:  I snuggle up against his pillow for comfort.

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