Post # 1
My family has been “supportive” of planning the specific wedding day. They haven’t taken any time to ask my about my Fiancé, Nick or our relationship, but they are very concerned about this one day. I should have know something was off when my aunt started refering to it as “her wedding” and telling me where things were going to go. One of the most recent hurtful things my family did was to invite my other aunt down to help with wedding stuff. I was told 1-2 weeks before they planned on meeting. I told them that I wasn’t available on that date but I want to be there when they do wedding stuff. Crazy, I know, being the bride and all and wanting to be involved in your wedding. My first aunt acted offended and shamed me saying “if you want to clean every little thing and tie bows on, that’s up to you”. They pretty much said too bad, and maybe I can skip what I was doing if I wanted to come or come later. I was SO hurt. I am now taking over everything. I don’t want to be spiteful and shut them out completely, but they have over stepped their bounds. My mom cries and apologizes about it, but she was the one that planned it, but didn’t invite me until after.
What are your thoughts?
A hurt bride.
The only upside: My Fiancé FINALY knows why I am so sad after leaving family events. So many times we would leave and he wondered why I was so upset, and thought things went fine. He now agrees that my family is not kind, but it all happens under the surface. Yay to making our own family, and setting boundaries with our current!
Post # 3
YOur family is absolutely crossing a line trying to plan YOUR wedding without YOU! Stick to your guns girl!!
Post # 4
I’m so sorry! I think the best thing is to try to take your wedding back. I don’t know if it’s any consolation to know that many brides go through family drama as well? // My family wasn’t supportive either. And, at times, I wanted to scrap all the plans and elope. *hugs*
Post # 5
Yes I agree. They were way out of line. Even still, I have to face them today, and I am just preparing myself for the snide comments. I am working on boundaries with them, and trying not to let them affect so much of myself and my emotions.
Post # 6
@jenrengee: Please don’t let their snide comments emotionally blackmail to do what they want to do.
This is YOUR WEDDING, you’rs and your future husbands. Do NOT include them in your planning whatsoever because they have no boundaries. Ignore them and do what you want to do. You do not have to answer phone calls and when you have your vendors set make sure you have a password set so no one can change your plans!!
Post # 7
@jenrengee: You have to set some boundaries here. If you upset them, so be it. Go along with planning your day, your way. If someone makes a special trip to help with planning, tough shit when they don’t get to help. Fortunately I think it’s safe to say you don’t have to worry about them actually implementing any of their plans.
Post # 8
They should’ve definetly asked you first. Since it was your mom who initially planned it, I don’t think she did it on purpose. I’m sure she is very excited to be planning a wedding with you, and she got carried away. Your aunts are her sisters, and probably just like her, wanting to be in the mix and helping in any way that they can. With that said, you aunt needs to calm down! Who the heck made her the bride??