- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2016
So without a doubt this will sound bitchy and like I’m envious. But please read past that, into my concern.
I just found out that a guy friend of mine got “engaged” to his girlfriend. The reason I put the quotation marks up is because they’ve been together for a little bit over a year, and apparently the “engagement” happened almost a year ago. Mind you, a lot of this is coming from another mutual friend. The guy who got engaged isn’t telling people yet. So that last part for me is big concern A. When you get engaged (like actually engaged and planning a wedding) how long would you wait to tell your family and friends? (rhetorical question, because probably not a whole year).
Big concern B. Before he met this current girlfriend/fiancée he was in a long term relationship with his ex, to whom he also got “engaged” only a few months into the relationship. Then about 4 years later they broke up. (So on the one hand, I guess it’s comforting to think that maybe with this one he won’t rush into things either.)
Moderate concern A. His ex got engaged (actually engaged, as in fully planning a wedding at the moment) about a year ago (… close to the time my friend and his current gf supposedly got “engaged”…)
Moderate concern B. His ex was all about children. That’s part of the reason they broke up. My friend was considering the subject at the time, but he wasn’t quite as ready as his ex. My friend’s current girlfriend doesn’t want any children of her own. Even though men can have children even at 90, I would hate to see him waste many years of his life, especially if fatherhood is something he actually wants.
I know how this all sounds. Yes, I’ve been with my SO much longer that this couple that is “engaged.” They also gives each other jewelry all the time.
But, it appears like they never fight, he doesn’t really talk about sex (even though with his ex he both fought with and discussed his sex life), not to mention that now he practically doesn’t talk at all about anything, and has stopped making time for his friends.
Sure, his current girlfriend irks us just a tad, but ultimately, we are concerned for our friend and want him to be happy.
Should we back off or start an intervention? (lol)
p.s: he and his girfriend are in their mid-20’s.