Post # 1
Just to create conversation… I just asked my FI if he planned to wear a ring because he doesn’t wear any other jewelry and I wasn’t sure. My dad never wore one. My mom told me one time that it had always bothered her (however they divorced when I was 12). He had two excuses, one being that he could not wear a ring at work (for safety, true) and the second being that if he was playing basketball, going up for a lay-up it might get caught on the hoop and rip his finger off. I think he was making things up on that last part, why wouldn’t he just take it off to play b-ball?
So then I got to thinking about how I would feel if my husband refused to wear a ring. I think I would be really hurt. How would you feel? Big deal or not-so-much?
My FI said that he would definitely be wearing one though, so good answer on his part!
Post # 3
I couldn’t care less if he wears a ring or not.
What he says and does is way more important to me that what he wears.
Post # 4
I had an ex who told me he would never wear one. He said that he thought it would attract more women rather than deter them. I think he was sketchy and I’m glad I dumped him! It would definitely hurt me.
Post # 5
I’m pretty sure it would be a deal breaker. I can’t even say that I would get even and not wear one. It is a huge symbolic gesture, one that comes with being married. Besides, work reasons, nothing else justifies it. I feel like I’m sounding a bit extreme but I guess I feel strongly about this. HA!
Post # 6
@jadlnc: I had the exact opposite experience with my parents. My dad has never worn his ring and he’s been 100 percent faithful. My parents have been happily married 33 years.
Not only that, my mom didn’t change her name. Can you believe a couple with such little commitment has stayed married for so long??? *sarcasm*
Post # 7
My husband didn’t want to wear one at first, but I told him it was really important to me. I’m not really sure why it’s so important, but it makes me really happy to see it on his finger. He wears it and he’s used to it now 🙂
Post # 8
I told my husband that I didn’t care if he wore his ring or not. But he does and I like seeing it on his finger every day.
@worldtraveler: LOL! My parents are the same. My mom never changed her last name, and my dad never wore his wedding ring (couldn’t due to his job). They’ve been together 35 years.
Post # 9
Well, considering men didn’t even wear wedding rings until WWII, and even then a “double-ring ceremony” was a novelty … it’s a pretty recent development, so yeah, I wouldn’t be super offended or anything if my FI didn’t want to!
He intends to wear one, though he has a really hard time wearing rings, they are incredibly uncomfortable for him. He is trying to wear one as “practice” but this is completely of his own accord and will, I would never make him wear one!
Yeah, it would be nice if he wore one, but ultimately we’re married and committed no matter what. It’s interetsing to me that some people see it as a dealbreaker, I’ll want to stick around and see if I can make sense of that opinion.
Post # 10
one of my best friends, her ex husband never wore a ring. he didn’t wear anything, he got rashes from jewelry. he wore one for their wedding, and then on special occasions for the first couple years. but after that, he didn’t wear one. it didn’t bother her, it didn’t make them any less married. but he also had that weird allergy. so there was that.
i think it’s a personal choice.
Post # 11
My parents didn’t wear rings, and it always seemed odd to me. They had a crappy marriage, but it lasted until my mom passed away.
DH always intended to wear a ring, and refers to it as the most important part of his outfit when he puts in on in the morning.
Post # 12
@worldtraveler: lol. But they sound like an adorable couple.
Post # 13
Doesn’t matter. My mom lost her ring while gardening and just stopped wearing one for ages because replacing a platinum ring is expensive. (She’s allergic to nearly everything else.) FH doesn’t want to wear a ring most of the time, he just doesn’t like the notion. He’s considering a ring tattoo, and a wide ring to wear on top for situations when he doesn’t want the ink to show. It doesn’t really bother me.
Post # 14
It wouldn’t be a big deal to me, but I know these things matter more to him. I plan to wear mine and I’m 110% sure that he will wear his all the time. He works in IT and has to use his hands a lot to carry servers, and take things apart so the #1 priority was buying a ring that’s durable enough to withstand all of that and his workouts at the gym because he doesn’t plan to take it off.
Post # 15
@strawbabies: That is so cute about your husband. 🙂
Post # 16
It probably wouldn’t bother me too much if DH didn’t wear his ring, but at the same time the fact that he always wears it and likes to wear it makes me feel happy.