- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014
I wrote a post about this a while ago, but cannot find it anywhere. I thing the bee ate it. So bear with me..
My venue is a unique situation. They are a privately run Men’s club that has existed since WWII. Their property is a large field on a lake. There is a small club house (for getting ready, etc), and then across the lake is an ENORMOUS picnic pavilion structure that is safe from the elements where we will be holding out wedding. It is large enough to house 20 gorgeous oakwood picnic tables that seat 10 each, two bars, a dance floor, and a BBQ pit where food is served (we are having an afternoon BBQ.)
They host events to cover the taxes on the property, as it has been owned outright for decades. The way that the man who runs the events department explained it to me, they host events and club members volunteer to work these events. Each event worked covers a portion of the members dues that they would otherwise pay out of pocket.
This brings me to my question concerning tipping. I asked the event coordinator what most people do and he explained it’s entirely at the clients discression. Some people tip individually, some people add the tip to the final sum, and some don’t tip at all. I was shocked that some people don’t tip at all, but he explained it’s not uncommon. Since it’s a volunteer situation with the people that run the facility cooking, serving food (it goes immediately from the BBQ to a platter where guests serve themselves), bartending etc., many people opt out of tipping the way some find it acceptable to opt out of tipping someone who’s the owner of a business.
We don’t feel entirely comfortable opting out of tipping. However, since the “norm” is so all over the place I’m struggling to decide how we should proceed. I am wondering if it is better to include a percentage in the final check, or to tip each person working the event individually? I worry that if we just add a tip to the lump sum it will wind up being deposited in the clubs bank account, and not go toward each individual worker themselves. My thought is if we tip each individual they can put it toward dues if they please, or can use it however they wish, but I will know that they have it one way or another.
If we were to do things that way, then the question becomes, how MUCH do we tip each person, and how to we go about getting it to each individual? FI says fifty dollars per person for a five hour event should be sufficient. Does this seem like enough? And if we do that, should we give each individual a fifty dollar bill, or ask how many people will be working the event before hand to give an envelope full of fifties to the person in charge? Or we could give it to our day of coordinator to distribute? What if someone is missed? It seems a little complicated to do things this way, but if I go back to just putting a lump sum in our final check, I’m back at “will the workers get the cash?”<br /><br />Does anyone have any advice? I’m usually pretty on point when it comes to wedding ettiquette, but this situation has me a bit thrown.