(Closed) Tired of hearing “weddings are stupid/a waste of money” etc

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

 here’s is how i think of it,  the wedding and reception is going to be the biggest party that we ever have.  ( and its about how you love and that you are celebrating being together for the rest of your lifes) its not about the money all the time. at the core it is a couple that want to share their love with their friends and family

Post # 4
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Actually I was somewhat of the same opinion until it was time to plan mine! LOL

One of the best things about being an older bride is that I no longer care what most people think any more! So when I wanted a wedding DESPITE being older and DESPITE it being marriage #3, I went on ahead and just did it!

It’s your day to celebrate your way and the amount of money you spend is your business!

Post # 5
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Actually I was somewhat of the same opinion until it was time to plan mine! LOL

One of the best things about being an older bride is that I no longer care what most people think any more! So when I wanted a wedding DESPITE being older and DESPITE it being marriage #3, I went on ahead and just did it!

It’s your day to celebrate your way and the amount of money you spend is your business!

Post # 6
Member
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012
Post # 8
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

don’t you just feel like saying “Cool! guess i don’t have to invite you to my obnoxious wedding!” or “boy, I’ll pass on an invite t any of YOUR parties!”

LOL

Post # 10
Member
3672 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

The way I’ve looked at it is that the people who are saying this to us are actually a little jealous mostly because they’ve been people who chose to have smaller weddings and spend money elsewhere.  I just tell them we’ve decided to spend our money on this, the same amount if not actually less than they’ve spent on things (like having a baby right away, or buying a house).  It is very frustrating still to hear “why are you spending all of this on a wedding and not a house?” but I go with the idea that it’s none of their business.  (And ours have at times been people close to us, even one or two members of the bridal party)

Post # 11
Member
4547 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

How rude! Just ignore them!

Post # 12
Member
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This is jealous.  Are these girls, single, with no boyfriend?  Or married, but had a very inexpensive wedding and is jealous when she hears about your details. 

Let it go.  Don’t let these comments bother you.  In the end, they have nothing to do with your wedding day.

Post # 13
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Heinz Chapel Ceremony, Museum Reception

I have gotten this constantly throughout our engagement. CONSTANTLY. It’s become a real sore spot with me. Yes, weddings are technically unnecessary to marriage, and yes, a lot of the expenses involved are somewhat frivolous and/or indulgent. However, TONS of things that people spend money on in our culture are frivolous and/or indulgent. Like….practically everything, really. People like to have nice things, do nice things, enjoy the pleasures of life. I have never had my financial choices freely commented on/critiqued until I got engaged. It drives me nuts.

Here the top 3 comments I’ve gotten. And by top I mean rudest:

3.) Woman at a professional development conference for my job, who is a stranger to me but overheard me discussing my wedding with a friend and leaned over and said this: “Okay, you know what? My sister had a $40,000 wedding last year and is divorced already. Think about THAT.”

2.) Close family member, being told I was in Pittsburgh doing some planning stuff: “Tell her I’ll give her a thousand bucks cash if she calls the whole thing off right now and goes to Vegas.”

1.) Another close family member: “I can’t wait until you wake up the morning after your wedding and realize what a huge mistake it all was.”

Phew. Felt good to get that off my chest.

Post # 14
Member
7301 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Well, honestly, I do kind of think they are a waste of money… but I’m still having one and I’m going to enjoy the best waste of money of my life! ๐Ÿ™‚  Don’t let them get to you!

Post # 15
Member
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think we all get that.  Mostly from people who already have had their stupid/waste of money wedding.  There are certain things in life that are worth celebrating and this is one of them.  That’s why all cultures do it and have been doing it for centuries.  The only thing I have learned is that it’s really tough to do on a small budget.  I’ll make sure my children spend even more money:)

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