(Closed) tired of the procrastination

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

How long have you been engaged? We got engaged last December 2011 and didn’t set a date until October 2012, mainly for financial reasons. Once we found out my parents were able to help with a big chunk of the payments, I told him I was going to start looking at venues. He was fine with that and it all just progressed from there. So over the last two months I’ve essentially planned the whole thing.

It’s not terrible to be engaged for a long time, but it’s also nice to know you are headed in the direction of an actual wedding. I can understand your frustration.

Post # 4
Member
3720 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Have you talked about it? Not in asking “so when do you want to set a date” in the middle of his favorite TV show on a long day of work, but having a real conversation? What I found helps is I say, “on Saturday morning I want to spend 2 hours on wedding stuff and I need your input”. I do my research and he vetos or agrees. He gets to choose which option he likes. “Do you want to get married on July 10th or October 15th” tends to get me a better answer than “when you do want to get married”.

Post # 7
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

I’m sorry sweetie but he just doesn’t seem to really want to marry you.  The fact that he won’t even talk about it is a bad sign.  I think you need to lay your cards on the table and tell him you want a husband, not a long term fiancé.  If you want to marry this guy, you guys need to start communicating and figure out if you are on the same Page or not,

Post # 9
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@Jill129:  It sounds like you need to lay everything out for him. For example, if he doesn’t want to set a date in the next month or so, you will no longer consider yourself engaged. 

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