Post # 1
Hey everyone! I just thought I’d write a post to keep me from bringing this up to my BF yet again! I’m starting to feel hopeless with the whole waiting thing. I have brought up my concerns to him about how I would like to be engaged already and he told me he was thinking that we would be engaged by this fall. I just feel like he is starting to become more disconnected from me and less interested in me than he used to. I guess this is to be expected after 4+ years together but it leads me to question if he really wants to be with me. He says he does but I’m just finding it hard to believe for one reason or another. I went through his e-mail (I know, horrible!) trying to find any clues that he was at least looking at rings/planning a proposal. But there was absolutely nothing of the sort. I just feel so desperate, I hate feeling out of control AHHH! I just needed to get it all out! I hope you are all doing better about “waiting” then I am!
Post # 3
Have you been wedding/engagement focused lately? More irritable? Having more discussions?
All those things could be pushing him away. I know when I went through those crazy waiting periods, FI (then BF) definitely was more distant.
When I just moved forward with my life, and hung out with him, with friends, did what made ME happy then HE would sometimes bring up marriage to discuss.
As hard as it is, try to “forget” about the proposal/marriage right now and focus on just being happy.
Remind him (by being your original self) why he wants to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you.
I was with FI 6 1/2 years before he proposed (our 7 year anniversary is Monday). Things got really rough when I started demanding a proposal and timeframe.
Once I backed off and started being ME again, he became much more loving and went back to being the boyfriend I loved.
Post # 4
If he says fall you’ve got a ways to go… why not enjoy your time until fall. If it doesn’t happen at fall then you’ll need further discussion.
Also, I really advise against checking up on him. 1) it’s going to ruin the surprise 2) it’s soo not cool to snoop unless you suspect cheating (even then… I’m not too sure). 3) the second you find nothing you’re all up in arms thinking what the hell, when that happens he probably just pulls away…
Post # 5
I am so sorry *hugs* give him until the fall as he requests and try to be patient =( which is very hard, I know.