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I think it is a great opportunity to bring future family members closer together. Just make sure that both are committed to the wedding party and that they understand the communication which will be expected of them. Also, make sure your FI is satisfied having someone in your parties, that you do not know as well.
Good Luck!
I asked both of my future SILs to be bridesmaids. I wanted them both to be part of our day (whether it is their "thing" or they have time to help me plan). Also, my FI is having my brothers as groomsment as well as my BIL (my sister's hubby).
I think it is a great way to send the message to your future family that you are a team and excited that they are sharing in your day!
I would ask her to be a bridesmaid. It will definitely bring you closer together.
I wasn't asked to be in my SIL's wedding (even though she was in mine). To be honest, it hurt then and it still hurts now.
Erindesmar couldn't have put it better :)
i don't know if you would be ok with this but- you could ask her to stand up with you and maybe give her an out for the other major bridesmaids duties like shower planning etc. Just knowing you want her to be involved could mean a lot, I asked my fsil and she is way more excited than say my actual sister (who is 19 and too cool lol) doing wedding stuff has brought us a lot closer!
I think that asking her is a great idea, and since she is far away let her know that she won't have to be responsible for all of the bigger duties. I did this with a very good friend that lived on the east coast and it worked out great. Let us know what you decide!
I asked my FSIL to be a bridesmaid. We aren't super close, but I think it will help our relationship in the future, I hope. So far she has been a huge pain in the butt. :/
My brothers and my fiance aren't super close, so we are having them as ushers instead.
If you are "trading" siblings in wedding parties I think it's a great idea. Plus if you want to. I didn't ask my FSIL to be my BM because I already had six close friends, but my FI ended up asking her to stand on his side. He was worried everyone would think she was gay, though! But, she'll be 7 months pregnant and it's kind of obvious she's married to the guy she's standing next to! (His brother in law is a groomsman too). SO! I think it's great!
We are lucky that we have the same amount of siblings; we both have a brother and a sister so it worked out well. Although I'm not super close to his sister, she is really excited, far more excited than I thought she would be, to be included and my FI's mother told me that his sister is really touched that I asked her. Go for it!
I have 3 BMs - two are my sisters and the third is his sister. He has my brother as one of his GM. I think it's a nice gesture, especially since this is the beginning of one big family for you all. :-)
I think you should include her, definitely!
If you think it will be a burden for her, then ask her toddlers (your future nieces/nephews) to be flowergirls/ring bearers. That way, she will have her kids with her and won't have to worry about somebody else taking care of them.
Or just ask her and not the kids! I'm sure another family member would love to take care of the kids while she is busy being a bridesmaid. :)
I asked my fiance's sister who I am somewhat friends with but not my other FSIL (his brother's wife) who I don't know very well. FI did not ask my brother as they also aren't very close. I will say his sister has been great and very excited about being involved. She's been a huge help and a great sport even though all the other bridesmaids are my close group of friends since high school and are not always the best at including her.
I asked my (at-the-time) FSIL to be my bridesmaid. She was actually the first one I asked; I handmade a card and gave it to her at Christmas. Inside it said that I always wanted a sister, and that I would be getting one when I married her brother, and that we would both be honored to have her support us as my bridesmaid. She cried when she read it, so of course, I cried too.
Anyway, the girl who was supposed to be my MOH stopped talking to me shortly after my FI proposed. I never got the chance to ask her. She won't even give me an explanation of why she won't talk to me. Since Mr. Apricot's sister was the one who threw me a bridal shower, and because of the fact that she will be involved in our lives for a long, long time, I asked her to be my MOH instead of just a BM. I'm really glad I did!
Even if you're not that close now, chances are you will get closer throughout the years of your marriage, and it's a good building-block for your budding relationship with her.
You should def ask her, I didnt ask my FSIL just because she's not even close to my FMIL any more 
plus my FI didnt want her there, so sad :( But my sister is one of my maids :D and my FBIL is a groomsman.
I think that could really help to share that experience with her :)
i asked mine, plus she is now getting married in december (i'm not going to be in hers but that's ok, paying for my own wedding right now so don't need this on top of my finances)... it definately has brought us closer together and is a great opportunity!
my FSI is one of my bridesmaids, and my brother is one of the groomsmen. i love the idea!
I asked both of my fiance's sisters to be bridesmaids, and they both cried they were so happy to be involved. I would do it again in a heartbeat, and I do think it's going to bring us closer!
My future SIL is one of mine. However shes just trying to steal my thunder on whatever she can do.... So i kinda regret it. However, i think it dosn't hurt to ask!:)
I think it's a great idea. Mr. K had my brother as one of his groomsmen and it was really cute. It sounds like she is super busy, so I would excuse her from doing some of the bridesmaid tasks.
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I have two bridesmaid so far, and I was thinking about asking my To-Be Sister in Law if she would be a bridesmaid. She lives in the Bay Area and we are not that close (yet hopefully).
She is a full-time Attorney, married, with 2 young toddlers. I don't want it to be a burden, but I think it would be a great opportunity to share this experience with her.
I would also like to have one of my brothers as a Groomsman too, but he barely knows my fiance.
Help!