To invite or not to invite?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
6026 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Tell your Fi to suck it up and do something nice for his stepmom. You’ll both be so busy during your wedding that I bet he won’t spend more than 4 minutes with the ex-boss. 

Post # 4
Member
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Banff, Alberta

@MintTurquoise:  Who ever feels the strongest about it, does step-mom REALLY want him there? But I do agree that one person you don’t overly like at a large-ish wedding isn’t going to make or break the day. You won’t notice. 

Post # 5
Member
1613 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

 @MintTurquoise:  It’s your FI’s wedding as as well as yours. If he does not want the man there, respect his wishes. He wants a happy day fulll of people he loves too. If this man will put a damper on the day, kindly tell SMIL that you want to respect your future husband and that couple can’t be invited.

Post # 6
Hostess
22135 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2011

It’s your/your FI’s wedding day, but the day is also really important to your parents. This may be one where it’s worth allowing the invite to making his dad and step-mom happy. And really, on your wedding day, you’ll be spending most of your time with your bridal party (if you’re having one) and each other, of course. 🙂 

Post # 7
Member
2873 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It’s FIs place to deal with the issue, as long as he can do so rationally.  He needs to sit down with his dad and step mom and explain why his old boss is not invited.  Especially because it’s both his problem and his family.

Post # 8
Hostess
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I would let FI and his dad sort this one out. He should tell his parents how/why he doesn’t like his old boss. Do they even know?

Post # 9
Member
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

If its not an issue of money or capacity, I’d say just invite them. Its an easy thing to give in to  to give you leverage against their future requests that you REALLY don’t want. 

Post # 10
Member
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Your FH should come before a SM friend.  If it were her immediate family I might say otherwise.

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