To invite or not to invite

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
1829 posts
Buzzing bee

Kourtlynn02:  I’m no etiquette expert but I don’t think you have to invite them. Regardless of how close you used to be or the fact you were in their weddings, what matters is how close you are now. 

Post # 3
Member
42546 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Kourtlynn02:  If you haven’t resumed the friendship, I’m not sure why you would want them at your wedding. If you would like to resume the friendship, reaching out to them to share your happiness by inviting them to the wedding, may be a way to accomplish that.

Post # 3
Member
6614 posts
Bee Keeper

It sounds like you have grown apart. You were at their weddings, but it was a different time. I wouldn’t invite them to your wedding. 

Post # 5
Member
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

nope, no sweat

Post # 6
Member
458 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think you have to invite them.  Chances are, they’d be doing the same thing, wondering if they should RSVP yes to your wedding or not, since you haven’t really continued your relationship.  They might feel like you were inviting them out of obligation.  Unless you really do want them to be there, skip it and save room for people that you’re close with now.

Post # 7
Member
7216 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Kourtlynn02:  You’re certainly not obliged to invite them if you’ve had little contact for 4 years. If you miss them and want them there, then go ahead and invite them. But you’re not obliged to.

Post # 10
Hostess
9919 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

Kourtlynn02:  I don’t think you have to invite them, but it sounds like you might want to try and rebuild that friendship.  Perhaps try getting the friendship back on the ground first and see how you feel. 

Post # 11
Member
5017 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Kourtlynn02:  I wouldn’t. Sorry, but they abandoned you during the time when you needed them most. If you haven’t reconnected with them, I would not send them an invite.

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