To Renew Our Vows or Not To Renew….

posted 3 years ago in Vow Renewals
  • poll: Vow Renewal or No Renewal at 8 years wedding anniversary?
    Yes, do a renewal : (5 votes)
    23 %
    No, just forget it : (9 votes)
    41 %
    Not for our 8 year, just wait : (5 votes)
    23 %
    Not at all, for reasons written below : (3 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    2688 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 1996

    I don’t know, personally I am not a fan of vow renewals unless something dramatic has happened. You don’t have to get married again, you know? Unless you’ve separated and got back together, or if one of you has been very ill and recovered, or if it’s a big anniversary like 20. If you just want to have a fun party to celebrate your anniversary, do that, but call it an anniversary dinner or party, and for goodness’ sake if you’re going to a restaurant do not expect people to pay for themselves. 😛

    Post # 4
    Member
    588 posts
    Busy bee

    I think you should wait for a bigger anniversary. I know it’s still arbitrary, but I think 10 years, 15 years, or 20 years, etc. are better numbers to plan a vow renewal for. 

    The only reason I’d do one for 8 years was, as a PP said, if you guys had seperated or had some event that required the vows to need to be renewed.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1590 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    My brother & sister each got married in ’07 and I dunno, it doesn’t seem like that long ago. My sister has mentioned how she would want to do a vow renewal soon. It was only said in passing and I’m sure it’s jealousy bc now it’s my turn to have a wedding. You know your family & relationship but I would think it was attention grabby if my sister did it.

    For the record, I know my sister and her jealousy issues. I don’t normally assume people are jealous.

    Post # 6
    Member
    3223 posts
    Sugar bee

    I voted not at all.  To me a renewal is something done to something expired or ended.  Presumably your marriage has not expired or ended.

    I guess I just don’t really see the point. But that being said it’s your money, and if you want to have a party have a party. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    317 posts
    Helper bee

    I adore vow renewals and have agonized about what’s right for us. After much thought about vow renewals, I came to the philosophy that if the renewal is just the husband and wife, they should do whatever they want whenever they want. But, once guests are involved, then you have to worry about what other people think. (Well, I guess you don’t have to, but I would!) I don’t think we’ll ever have a vow renewal involving guests. It just seems like so many people view vow renewals as attention whore-y. I disagree with this and think it is too harsh of an interpretation, but the reality is that some people think that way and I didn’t want to add stress by worrying about what those people think. So, we will renew our vows every few years, but I want it to be just the two of us. Anniversary parties are different, people seem to respect those more, but I think the etiquette is that they are for major anniversaries like the 10th or 20th. So, that is what I would suggest.

    But, at the end of the day, if you do what makes you  happy and aren’t asking anyone else to be inconvenienced, I say it’s fair game. =)

    Post # 9
    Member
    104 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Look, a vow renewal is not for everyone. Some people don’t want one and that is their right but others have their own reasons. Is your reason for a vow renewal a special one? Is it to recommit and remember the day you were married and want to celebrate? Me personally I am keeping my family OUT of my vow renewal. It has nothing to do them and is just between he and I, not something for others.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3195 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    TrueLove407:  

    Inviting loved ones depends on whether or not your family will be supportive.

    We are having a vow renewal for our fifth anniversary. It will be just like a wedding. 

    My family is very excited, so we don’t feel silly about our plans. In only five years of marriage, we have weathered many storms and we want to celebrate that.

     

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