Post # 1
Firstly as a discliamer, I am getting married in the UK where is perfectly acceptable and common to invite guests to the reception only and not to the ceremony/wedding breakfast/speeches/. I don’t want to get dumped on because we have decided to do this…I’m not here to debate that.
For those people that I am inviting to just the reception part of the wedding day, do I send a STD to them also? I do not want to mis-lead people into thinking that they are invited to the whole day if they are only invited to the evening reception. Am I right in thinking that I should only send an STD to people attending the whole day?
Thanks for any advice!
Post # 2
We’re having a super small ceremony (parents, siblings, and nieces/nephews only) and only sent STDs to those invited to ceremony. However, we’re having kind of a large reception, and we’ll be sending separate invitations for that when we send out the ceremony invitations.
The reception invitations will clearly state “please join us for dinner, music, etc. in celebration of our marriage” or something along those lines so there’s no confusion.
Sending a STD is pretty much a precursor to an invitation (to the ceremony), in my opinion, so we decided to not send them to everyone to avoid any confusion.
Post # 3
I would be confused if I received a STD and then only an invite to the reception. I would only send them to people who’ll be there all day.
Post # 4
I’m in the UK as well, I sent save the dates (and invites- half of our guests are based in the states) to those invited to the ceremony / wedding breakfast.
Our evening guests are mostly my partner’s work colleagues so they’re getting Paperless Post invites as we don’t have addresses for them / don’t want to hand them out at work as it is a giant office and a limited venue.
Post # 5
Also in the UK. I have never recieved a STD when I was only invited to the evending reception. We are going to a wedding next week to which we are invited to the evening reception but FIs parents are invited all day, they got a STD and we didn’t. The bride is quite etiquette concious generally so I would assume that this is the correct way to do things.
Post # 6
- Wedding: May 2015 - The Runnymede Hotel
To be fair, from a fellow UK bride, Save the Dates (I’m sorry, can’t call them STD’s! Doesn’t anyone know what else that stands for?!) are not common or expected. I’ve only heard about them in the past few years and I think they’re unneccessary unless you are having a destination wedding.
You may have another reason they are neccessary. I would agree with the others and not send them to evening guests. Purely because for the evening guests it’s not really expected that they ‘save the day’, more like they can pop along in the evening at their convenience.
Post # 7
Honestly I think save the dates are a waste of money (unless it’s a destination wedding)…people get the invite enough in advance.
Post # 8
Warhol_Girl89: Haha, I forgot about the other kind of STD!
Post # 9
You won’t get dumped on in the etiquette world for having a small ceremony and large reception, it’s the reverse that is considered rude. If there is anyone you especially would like to have a heads up about your reception, the best thing to do IMO is to communicate with them personally by way of a phone call, note or email.
Post # 10
- Wedding: October 2014 - Church
waddle: After my experience I would say no unless you are doing a weekday or have a lot of out of country guests. STDs are a recent trend and plenty of people don’t really know what they are lol.
Post # 11
Thanks Bees. We do want send these out as FIs family are hours and hours away from my home village. We also have some out of country invites to send, Australia, Ireland and Norway.
We will be only sending these out to people attending the whole day. Thank you.
Post # 12
Save the dates are also useful if the wedding is during a holiday time when people may otherwise travel. My wedding is 12-27 so I am doing STDs so that people can decide if they will travel for CHristmas or stay here so they can attend.
Post # 13
Can I ask you what wording you are using for your reception/party only invitations? I will be doing the same, yet I’m struggling coming up with the appropriate wording.
Can anyone share their wording with me?