Post # 1
We have chosen to have a flower girl in our wedding who is a complete tomboy. Let’s call her “Sophie.” She is 11. Wears nothing but basketball shorts, soccer jerseys, basball hats, sneakers…you get the picture. I adore her and my fiance has known her since the day she was born., her parents even longer. We would not have anyone else in our wedding as the flower girl. At this point we dont even have a ring bearer. She might serve as both.
I am asking some opinions on what to have her wear. I do not want her in a frilly dress or flower head piece. That is not Sophie. I want Sophie as Sophie in our wedding. I have even told her she is welcome to ride her skate board down the asile if she would like. We lover her for who she is and wouldnt have anyone else do the job. Her mom tells me she will make her wear what I tell her to. But I want her to be happy and be herself.
Our colors are brown and green. I guess a rustic DIY wedding to classify it. Our wedding is pretty casual and the complete oposite of traditional. So, I am pretty open to suggestions.
Post # 3
Would she be okay with a simple white or ivory sundress? It could just be a simple cotton dress.
Post # 4
Post # 5
@chiapet0750: I wish this came in a different color … but this style dress or a dress like it would be ADORABLE with green or brown chuck taylors and a cute denim style jacket
Post # 6
Take her shopping and pick something. You know her best– plus it’d give you some extra bonding time. 🙂
Post # 7
Hmm. Never thought about adding boy-ish accessories to a dress. She would look cute. Not sure if she would go for a dress, worht a shot. The one thing I have noticed as she gets older is that she realizes that she is different from the other girls. Infact the other night she chose not to wear her hat out to dinner with us. Which is like a HUGE step! Maybe by letting her wear a dress she might be expanding her horizons.
Love the leggings idea too!
I do have a shopping trip planned with her and her mom. I was getting some ideas to bring up.
Post # 8
I think it is wonderful that you are so accepting of her. However, she is old enough to understand that there are times in life that we get dressed up. No matter what, she should be dressed appropriately for your wedding, and not just in something that works for her.
Having said that, there are lots of ways to get there. It sounds as though maybe she is ready to explore her inner girl. I know my 13 year old niece suddenly became very interested in how she looked once she had a fancy dress, up-do, manicure, etc. Prior to my wedding, she really didn’t care. So, have her try on dresses that YOU would really like her to wear. She might just need a little nudge. If that doesn’t work, buying a boys suit and dressing it UP with feminine accessories might work as well. Ruffly blouse, sparkly shoes, etc.
Post # 9
Maybe you should take her with on the shopping trip and explain to her that you know her style isn’t princess-y, so you want her to be able to give some input as to what she likes. You and her mom could of course offer her guidance as you shop, but then she could feel like she’s a part of the experience and take ownership of the look!
Post # 10
@CrystalBlackheart: I think if you took her shopping for cool looking chuck taylor’s or some cute vans first you may be able to coax her into a dress to match. If she’s anything like I was, she’ll probably feel really uncomfortable in anything too girly – so maybe veer towards dresses that are more simple and classic. I was an insufferable tomboy myself and have only slightly grown out of it — I’ve also noticed my taste tends to go a little in the direction of demure and modest rather than edgy.
I can’t wait to see what you two choose!
Post # 11
Also, try not to pidgeon-hole her. If you approach her with the attitude of I know you’re going to hate this, then she will be more timid. But if you frame your wedding as a completely different category from her everyday life, she’ll probably be a lot more adventurous, and open to finding a dress she likes that’s not her usual “style”.
It may be a bigger deal for you to see her in something girly than it is for her. If you’re positive and upbeat about it, she’s more likely to enjoy it.