Post # 1
Newly engaged bee here, this is my first thread (EEEK!! :D) so I hope I’m doing this right…
Anyhoo, my FI and I are planning a long engagement, almost three years, but my FMIL is so super excited about our engagement that she wants to start dress shopping immediately. I explained to her that I thought it was too soon to start shopping because we literally have nothing planned and I’m one of those girls that has absolutely no idea what I want for my wedding. She said that it would be fun to just go and start looking to figure out what I like.
I was just curious what other bees have done in this situation? Is it too soon? If so, how can I politely explain my concerns to her?
Post # 2
It’s fun to try on dresses, but I’d say wait a little longer before buying the dress. I’ve seen a lot of bees express dress regret, even when they’ve had just a year to plan. Your tastes might change, or you might see something you like a lot more later on down the road.
Post # 3
leeshabee: I know it’s way too early to buy a dress. But is shopping going to be harmless or do you think it’s going to hurt me in the long run? I don’t want to wind up see so many dresses I can’t keep my thoughts straight, but I also want to know exactly what I want and don’t want when it does come time to buy because I want the planning process to go by very easily because I’ll have so much time to figure out what we want.
Im just very confused by the whole planning process, can you tell? Lol
Post # 4
I would wait at least another two years. There’s no way I would still think the dress is “the one” 3 years later. I would explain to FMIL some of the same concerns you voiced in your OP. BUT I have seen some bees have their dress for years and still love it so it could be possible.
Post # 5
- Wedding: February 2015 - Mount Hermon
FutureMrsHodgy: I would definitely wait. My cousin did the same thing and ended up hating her dress, but a new one was out of budget. I bought mine a year out, after I had been engaged for 4 months. That would give plenty of time to deal with any disasters that come up, but not so much that your taste is likely to change.
Post # 6
Go try on dresses for fun sure, but i definitely wouldn’t be buying before I knew my wedding venue/vibe.
Post # 7
FutureMrsHodgy: I think checking out some dresses in different styles would be beneficial for you to start figuring out what you like. There’s nothing like trying them on. I thought a few styles would look good on me and when I tried them on, I realized how wrong I was.
That being said, I’d maybe spend the next year or so figuring out your budget, guestlist and start looking at venues before checking out dresses.
Post # 8
3 years is a LONG time, wait until 1-1.5 years away, know venue and “feel” of the wedding and ready to buy a wedding dress. Just looking and trying on dresses may be fun and all, but if you try on too many you could just be confused when it comes time to pick and end up with dress regret.
Post # 9
Thanks for all the help ladies! I think I’ll put the breaks on shopping for fun until we have a better idea of everything, especially since the reason she wants to go look at dresses is because we both happened to see a gorgeous dress in a bridal shop window a few months ago. While I love the dress it is SO wrong for what small amount of stuff I do have pictured in my mind. I’m leaning towards a beachy destination wedding and this is a heavily gold embroidered fit and flare. So pretty but so wrong Lol