Post # 1
So I recently moved in with my parents because of the cost of grad school. I have ZERO friends here, every one (friends/family) lives in Florida or New England. I really would like to have a shower (sorry if that sounds bratty), but everyone just lives WAY too far away. Same goes for my bachelorette party. Any thoughts? (And PLEASE don’t judge me for wanting parties thrown for me… I just would like the whole experience and family/friends have been asking me about it and I don’t know what to tell them.)
Post # 3
Is there any way you can travel to them?
My sister lives far away and when she gets engaged I’m hoping she’ll come to us for her parties.
Post # 4
That’s not bratty! I’m more of the entertainer of my friends…..so I might do my own shower….really it’s just a get together with the women you love. It doesn’t have to be about all the gifts and formality that some people do. Can you travel to them and do it at a restuarant, or picnic style….or something?
Post # 5
Are your friends into technology and open-minded about ettiquette?
I have been to a shower where the gifts were opened by someone else ( in this case the bride’s mother, but it could be a close friend) and the bride skyped into the shower.
If you don’t think they would be offended and you can’t travel to them, you could have this discussion with someone you think might host such a shower.
After the shower the gifts were couriered to the bride.
Post # 6
I’m a little bit of a stickler for ettiquette, but I really like Julies1949’s idea. I think that would be fun and you would get to participate and have fun, just long distance. I think the only issues would be for maybe any older generations you might invite that might not understand Skype and then also shipping the gifts to your house (which could really add on a lot of costs). As for the bachelorette party are you thinking something wild or tame? If you just wanted a chill get together with the girls then maybe you could wait till just before the wedding when everyone will be in town to do something. I would talk to your MOH, it’s her job to plan that:)
Post # 7
If shipping is prohibitive, you can always have a friend return the gifts in the town they were purchased (only works for chain stores), get a store credit or gift card for you, then you re-purchase the gift where you live.
Post # 8
My cousin (who lives in Canada, but is getting married in Connecticut in August) recently offered a solution to our problem. She is having a “family shower” in New England with just a few friends invited, but men and women were invited. Everyone really enjoyed it and the party looked “full.” She is later going to have a special brunch just with her girlfriends the week of her wedding because most people will be arriving early.
I think for my bachelorette (my only sister is my maid of honor and has told me to pick what I want and she’ll plan it lol) we’ll just pick a weekend and take a short vacation to Vegas or a great beach. Once my bridesmaids get here we’ll do something a little more tame, because it will likely have to be the night before the wedding.
I love the idea of skyping! I think I’ll end up doing the reverse and have people (like my bridesmaid from Spain or the Philippines) skype in for certain events. I’ve heard other people suggest a “gift card shower” where people just send gift cards to me but I think it would be rude to ASK for gifts. I have no idea where that idea originated but I hope no one is actually using it.